Tell me what this fella does (Slay the Spire 2)

Name: Tell me what this fella does (Slay the Spire 2)
Uploaded: 2026-07-12
Channel: Northernlion
Description: Full searchable transcript of "Tell me what this fella does (Slay the Spire 2)" (Slay the Spire 2) — 67 lines, each linking straight to that moment on YouTube.

Northernlion2026-07-12Slay the Spire 2

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67 lines transcribed from this video. Click any timestamp to jump to that moment.

0:00 does he ever win? kate, slay the spire 2, like literally, there was a sweet spot. i'm sorry, we already did our hour with this guy. there was a sweet spot where it felt like you could win on ascension 10. but then i honestly, i don't know what happened. we went away for two weeks and when we came back, they had changed the game just enough to make it seem like it's impossible. like it's impossible to win a run of slay the spire 2 now. there we go. he had a scar across his face.
0:44 he wears a hearing aid. i would like to first go hefty tablet, necromastery. whenever you play a card this turn, apply three doom to the enemy! oblivion in a souls deck could be pretty good, but necromastery early is mighty interesting as well. and then just building big oasty, but oblivion's really good, man. and then removing the injury from your deck and adding an injury.
1:25 alrighty, oblivion's bait. that didn't stop you from telling me to play it when the remake came out. that didn't last too long though, i'll tell you that much. something like severance would work well here i think. infebeing touch is really good too, but... enchant the card with sown. absolutely necessary.
2:19 apple plus said the same. i don't know. i'm not just trying to be a dickhead. i don't understand the joke apple plus must have had a show called oblivion but the only oblivion x' i know are the elder scrolls game and then the oh set oh, you would know severance. okay, we're talking about severance because i added a card called severance to my hand to my deck. i should say why didn't you say so?
2:48 severance was on hbo, but we get the gist. i don't think that's true, man. i just don't think that's... i think it was on apple tv. they're calling you out on that one. look at that. they're saying it's an apple tv original. you know what? with enough souls, automation could hit, man. and we got the moulin rouge. zero cost automation. i can live with that. summon vyvtine. severance is on pbs. you can literally get it for free with a library card. and that's a fucking fact.
4:07 huge. huge. more. i'm just trying to think about how we're gonna kill you. i think we're gonna kill you. it's probably gonna be a big oblivion turn like this, for example. and then putting up as much block as possible. two more cards gets us there. huge. apple tv's got some shooters. i'm telling you for your own, and this is me acknowledging that i'm the asshole in this situation, okay?
4:53 you have to stop talking so much about tv in my chat. and the thing is, the reason is because it's turning me into that guy who's going to say things like you guys sure watch a lot of tv. because i haven't watched any tv in 2026 so i don't have anything that i can add anything to this. you watched a hundred movies? yeah, yeah, that's like two seasons of tv though.
5:24 that's the thing, that's why i'm like, people are like, i think you're, my position is that society has overbought prestige television shows and is not putting the respect on cinema that it deserves to be honest. people will say things like they like movies but then they see like four movies a year and they'll watch like seven seasons of a tv show that they find like just one tick past boring. which i, i mean, i don't know, i'm just not, i guess it's another thing in the not neurotypical category.
5:55 you like how i'm using that for everything now? it feels good. i understand why you guys were doing that for so long. now that i'm doing it, i fucking get it, man. it feels awesome. you can't keep saying that. i have said it's only gonna get worse. it's only gonna get worse, man. let me get a drain power. the negative test result is gonna fuck with you? the test is too expensive for it to not find something. i'm sorry. you know how the healthcare system works.
6:37 it's gonna find something. might as well, man. we're gonna beat you off with socks, man. as i understand, i'm not fully familiar with everything in the neurodivergent community, but i think that people like me would not be that disappointed. i think that might be a plus, man. seems like the sort of thing my people might be into, depending on the sock. we had an absolutely dog shit firsthand, so we do not need to play a drain power. we do need to play some defense.
7:26 and we already got oblivion out there. and then more and more and a bodyguard and then unleash. and tuning forks almost ready. i really thought we might not have to deal with the fellas on this one after all that, whatever your mom next turn. fuck these guys man for the birds. can i tell you something? this is serious by the was not serious but it's real. i literally bots.
8:26 motion sickness patches that go behind your ear so that i can play more mecha chameleon. that's a great card. do they work? well, i went down the rabbit hole that i always go down, which is like i googled like cures for motion sickness in video games and then like
8:49 people were like i use scopelamine and it works great and then i googled like scopelamine patches and it turns out like all medicine that actually works you need to get a prescription which is like okay i can get a prescription but i have to fucking make an appointment with my doctor. my doctor is not gonna be excited for me to be like when i play video games
9:11 i, my tummy hurts and i want to throw up. she's going to be like, okay, we'll see you in like two and a half years. so the odds of me getting a prescription for that in a timely fashion is really, really low. okay. so i got like, i asked what about the, like the ones that don't have real medicine that goes, go behind your ear, but you can just buy them online. and people were like, yeah, they actually work pretty well. so i got some of those and we'll, we'll give it a test. we'll give it a look see.
9:48 they just need to add an fov slider. no bro, this is the thing. you're not talking to real motion sickness heads. people, we were talking about basically i'm saying you're ableist because people don't fuck with you. they love to hear that you have motion sickness in video games until you say yeah i've changed the fov and then they go okay buddy fuck you i was just trying to help. i was literally just trying to help but you've already tried oh i applied zero effort to try to solve your problem. well that's about as far as my sympathy goes.
10:20 i've done the fov, the game's running at a good frame rate. i just get it, man. i just get it. i'll tell you some things that trigger it. lower frame rate triggers it. first person is the biggest trigger for it. and anything that flips perspective for sure. and games that are not well lit. so especially first person horror games. so horror games that are dark but then you have a flashlight and you move the flashlight around, triggers it like crazy. and screen shake.
10:52 screen shake totally fucks with it. you get it in vr? yeah, yeah, yeah. but luckily there's like one good vr game that's ever been made so i don't have to worry. i played every vr that's ever been made. driven the back road so i wouldn't get laid.
11:13 you didn't change flv because they don't have it? i'm crashing out? no, what i'm saying is that mecha is not the only game where this happens, bro. i've been alive on this planet for 37 years, you were not privy to it. this is like a recurring thing. actually, as i get older, it gets a little bit worse. okay, okay. yeah, bro, that didn't fucking exist when you opened your eyes, motherfucker. i've been here tiptoeing since you were like negative 11.
11:41 it's motion blur for me. and you know what the average person does? they go, oh, i don't have that one. fuck you! i'm sympathetic to you. i do feel like mirror oblivion could be big for us, man. or mirror severance. let's mirror severance and see how this shit goes, man. you have potions for me? and we might just have to kill you via doom. youch, what do you got for me? an entirely new form of discovery? it's gonna have to be this, man.
12:40 chet, can you remind me to change the title of my mecha chameleon bod that's coming out in two days? because i think right now it's called da vinci type stuff and it's me on the clock in the art gallery like the betruvian man. but instead i want to change it to be a john cale reference from paris 1919. i want it to be just casually appearing on the clock across the hall. i want that. that's what i want.
13:10 i wouldn't get it. you don't know that song? you're a ghost, na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na
13:43 i don't know if mouth is familiar with the whole mel gibson speech when he was arrested, which is why that for a second it seemed like that was gonna and i mean i was not scared because i know mouth and i know the words that were coming out of mel gibson's mouth would never have come out of mouth's mouth. it's a tough sentence but i could understand if you did not know mouth as well as i know mouth you might be like where's this guy going with this but
14:10 i know mouth as well as i know him so it's not a... there's no surprise for a beast like me. just put it that way. what are we cooking on here? four more cards would get us one extra energy. did you see what we fucking... type of shit we were able to get away with on that turn? eidolon is just crazy, man. i just... i just can't... i just can't imagine it working. it almost feels like it works here but i just can't imagine it... can't imagine it coming to pass.
15:01 we have no benefit from an ethereal synergy, but you could always just choose not to play the card, i guess. no chance to say that's an awfully hot cocoa pot? fuck it, bro. i'll take the test guitars, ember. easy enough. simple as. i didn't miss disc golf masters. well, here's the thing. we're not gonna play disc golf masters today. but we are gonna play it tomorrow, i think. and i think we're gonna have a lobby set up for it, man. which is the craziest part of all.
15:51 that's right, i think we got a squad going. can you believe it? it's literally mogs you, so we'd be stupid not to try it. then you give me oblivion, of course. you could do something like that. why'd you say potty squatty? but now the craziest part is that in my head, my head's going potty, squatty, potty, squatty, potty, squatty. like meg the stallion type shit. that might be cardi b now that i think about it. fuck it bro, another severance? no, is meg the stallion? you take those.
16:43 i know it's not ice spice, don't fucking lie to me. walt, we have none blocks. none blocks. i think that means a cure all is the play, man. ten skills gives you a bunch of block. now we're fucking talking. not bad at all. this deck actually seems good, man. fuck seams, this deck actually is good. the only problem is we need to draw oblivion about four times more frequently than we are at present.
17:45 i'm just trying to get yeah get the tuning fork and then get the kill and we start with tuning fork next time oh he's thinking and it was a true you're relaunching the streamer cruise as a circumnavigating flight and finishing in hong kong that actually would be fucking sick that would be awesome i'll think about it i'll think about it do it in a blimp and i'm in that would be horrific listen we don't have to go through all this again one second i gotta play my blocks first like that
18:35 give me this. then we play a soul regardless. automation comes out. not my best turn. we land our shod, we land our attack, we play a defend, we land an attack, and then this is where we find a way to minimize the damage dealt. maybe just killing you via letter opener in strikes? not gonna happen. instead i'll gain zero block. enchant an attack with vigorous eight. lose colorless... that's a good trade. i can live with that.
19:30 man, he hates enfeebling touch. magic mushroom, how are you going to feel that now that i've seen that comment, i'm obviously going to take it, then i'm going to lose the run and i'm going to blame you forever? even though a run being a win or a loss is a confluence of many different factors in this game. how are you going to feel about that? are you willing to deal with that? are you willing to deal with... you've been around a long time. are you willing to deal with being known for that as the only element of your personality that i recall from now until the end of time? i don't think so. i don't think so.
20:03 we dodge the elites. it's gotta be daughter of the wind even though i don't think it's relevant for us at all. two cards. i would prefer to not take a bunch of damage. is there any world in which that can come to pass? no. not in the slightest. draw some cards. play... i get hit.
20:59 and then can i can't quite kill you which is devastating but this is a skill which will do all okay this and this will kill you and then this gets us to enough block and you're when we're pogging we did use tuning fork though. devastating loss of aura on on the tuning fork play but you know what? it doesn't even matter because the souls are going to get us to another tuning fork asap anyway, then we have livian you which we probably should have done to begin with.
21:33 any new stims hot off the presses? i'm sorry to say i feel like we've been kind of any percent stimulus lately except for the trucker song willing for some reason that's been sticking in there quite nicely mexican coke is not a stim. it's a it's a song and it's a good one at that. we're piss nuke piss nuke is kind of breach containment that's true. i can't deny piss nuke decision red card. yeah, that's it
22:20 decision red cards got a certain je ne sais quoi as well. let's start strong here. three severances. hbo wishes, man. as far as i can recall, they don't even have, uh... they don't even have one. should've hit you, though. should've hit you. you get no... oh, i forgot! you get nothing. pay attention. yes. order's all fucked up. i don't wanna hear it, man. you get nothing. pay attention. yes, man.
23:09 i forgot about that one. i forgot about the ttc leprechaun. that's embarrassing. huge tuning fork, holy cow. i don't talk with airheads, pay attention. can i get an oblivion, please? one card away from gaining energy. i'll go in on that. never mind, we are nine cards away from gaining energy. the market difference. you're doing 14 damage, i'll just hit you with one of those then. one card away?
24:03 from gaining energy. one card drawn away from gaining energy. okay, the vulnerability is nice. we do need to be able to survive. how about an oblivion? oblivion into a soul, into more souls somehow. i don't even know if that would be possible. four more cards drawn. drawing four more cards is so doable. literally that gives us our energy back. put oblivion on you, but then we got to flip it back around this way.
24:42 it would be really nice for you to just be dead, but i don't think that's gonna happen. so we're gonna take a little hit here, but that was still a great turn, man. four cards until we get more energy. holy cow. are you 11 damage too vulnerable? we gotta simmer on that. we need to draw into oblivion, please. we need to get to tuning fork so we can get some passive block. two more cards. very, very doable.
25:29 oblivion, wait, it's kind of it's doing something. it's doing something. and then you know what could we draw more this term probably but we could also just set up our next turn. energy, draw, attack, draw, draw, attack, draw. wait, there's a certain chance for infinitiveity in here that's got me mighty tickled. where's my oblivion, bro?
26:15 i would also like to not take damage. wait, two more skills though gives us tuning fork. and we just got more energy! oh baby. i like that. this is slicker than cum on a gold tooth. that's certainly evocative. why are people saying, huh? like think about it. think about it first. first off, i didn't originate it. the chatter originated it. secondly, i think it's a perfectly valid analogy. whenever you play an ethereal card, gain four block.
27:05 we're gaining an ethereal card once per turn. undeath is wait, undeath is amazing bro, because undeath is skills. which gives us yeah, i like undeath man. it'll clog you? i don't think it's gonna clog me too much bro. oh no, i'm getting clogged by zero cost blocks that give me 10 defense bro. aeon glass? yeah, i've never fought this guy also so this might be a little touchy. well, let's take choice's paradox.
28:02 you are going to select a card and add it to your hand. it's not going to be free. you're going to give me seance, and i'm going to make a sender's bane into a soul. aeon, you glass. i didn't say banana. yeah? okay. certainly see what you're going for there. and can't really disagree. fuck it bro, cross the plane.
28:51 unleashed does like nothing. would i rather do five damage than eight but get us closer to tuning fork? sure, why not? and we store the block in the battery regardless. oh, this is what i'm fucking taught. every time you apply doom, get some block. oh! eight more cards till we get energy. that's pretty unlikely, but i ain't sweating it too much because look at this. i could have played dirge and taken zero, but whatever. death's door seems nice, man. death's door seems fucking nice.
29:37 hard to deny the value of a dredge and a grave warden and a turn one wisp. huge. and then we've applied doom, so guess what? tons of block. stupid question. run a fool's errand. easy. and you're gonna say, aren't they the same thing? no, they're not. chasing a red herring, your task was solving a case or something detective like.
30:25 if you've chased a red herring, you've wasted time. you're actually further from your goal than you were if you had stood in the same place and done nothing. a fool's errand? maybe you didn't complete the task, but the task couldn't have been completed to begin with, so nothing's really changed. at least you got some work done. stupid, stupid question, man. is soul a soul and an oblivion, and then oblivion, and then a soul, and then a soul, and a strike, and a soul, and an undeath? to draw, who draw?
31:04 we get some energy. oh, we get some block anyway. now you're in a lot of trouble. now you are in a lot of trouble. a thousand bucks or 500 dinners with jay z. i honestly, in my heart of hearts, i would certainly rather have a thousand bucks than 500 dinners with jay z. that's just a lot of pressure. i understand that like 500 dinners is worth more than a thousand dollars, but at some point your mental health is worth something, man. this shit is priceless.
32:09 is it? i mean it's gonna take me like a fucking year or something to get through all the dinners with jay z, man. i don't wanna have dinner with jay z. i don't have like anything against him, but i don't have anything fucking for him either. i don't wanna have dinner with jay z 500 times. just let me get the... i'll take the grand easy and then we'll just call it a day. probably better for hov as well, all things considered, because then...
32:40 he doesn't have to waste his time with a...with a...a nave such as myself. destroyed. what if you hit it off? i mean, but the thing is sometimes it's just nice to like... don't get me wrong, it's nice to have friends. sometimes it's nice to just have dinner and look at your phone though. they're both vibes, man. another dredge to bring back souls. you...you hit badly on the first turn. your wizard needs food badly. okay bro, we all do. stop wasting my time. you think he'd be good at joke boat?
33:51 yeah, i don't know. it's kind of a dead end question. the only way to get yourself out of this is to say something like, okay, who wrote king kong godzilla loch ness? who wrote this? hova, was that you? uh huh. just imagine it's probably something he would say, something like that. this might get rough, man.
34:37 you're dead, thankfully. you gotta go now. you know what? we probably at least want to pop a strength potion. that was enough to ice you. huge. 13 damage. 13 damage might as well be 0 damage. we don't want to accidentally draw into oblivion. we got a huge oblivion turn coming up. wait. death march 2. what did i fucking tell you? did i tell you this or did i not tell you this? what do we have over here? fucking nothing. 59 damage off this? holy shit.
35:25 more souls? oh more souls! more fucking souls bro! jeez! two additional damage for each soul in your draw pile. that'll be a nice scaler for us for sure. strawberry, fantastic. first hand you draw each combat's upgraded. what the wrong with that? aeon glass is gonna eat your lunch. anyone want to tell me what aeon glass does? it's kind of like the time keeper
36:21 it eats your lunch, you get nothing pay attention. oh you repo you so i suppose that's i can't really complain about that you repo yourself i don't really want any of these man. what a fucked up turn. fuck it man you got to do something cross the plane. very nice death's door is now good every card you play wait. okay, dredge me bring back three zero costs 11 damage
37:20 summon 6 and still take damage. well, go with 11 damage then. 31 fucking damage? we're in like big time get a life territory here. huge tuning fork though. i don't want to play all these souls. yes i do because it buffs our other card that does damage based on the souls. soul in the draw pile, huge. a soul that generates more souls, generates a strike. we don't have to take damage this turn. absolutely no reason we have to take damage this turn.
38:18 why would i? literally you're already dead bro. double the effects of a debuff. unlikely to matter too much. twice as much doom on our first oblivion maybe? chant a card that exhausts with soul's power. not really like... you know what? i really feel like dredge is better than dirge here. even though the entire chat is typing dirge in all caps. i really feel like dredge is better.
39:08 because dredge coming back and bringing back like one to three souls every single time is so huge. you could also take forgotten soul. one damage to all enemies anytime you exhaust a card. i feel like dredge is the play man. but what is the consequence? you get one decay? no vice versa. one damage to a random enemy, not all.
39:39 i know i exhaust a lot, but the thing is like if the boss is gonna have 400 hp i feel like i would rather set up turns where i could apply like 40 extra doom. it adds up yeah, but so does the doom sounds trash against aeon. nobody told me what the guy does nobody told me what he does. so i have to just play from i gotta play from the gut. oh my god. oh my god. oh
40:33 30 damage turn one kind of pissing me off though. you're all right, it doesn't work. so there's that a dredge that you know what dredge that brings back another oblivion. not gonna get the tuning fork is what it is. extra energy, more doom. there we go. don't run out of the dredge sauce or nothing. see now that is a classic fucking reference. give me another soul.
41:20 didn't draw into a soul you get nothing pay attention. i'm gonna hit you with something controversial we don't want to waste tuning fork pass your turn. we got a safe tuning fork for this turn i would love to find a way to apply doom to you this turn could draw a lot like if i dirge i'm gonna get three souls in my draw pile i don't think it's the move. i think you just do it this way you get a soul anyway, you get multiple souls. anyway, you get a strike. i
42:10 five skills gets us tuning fork, 27. i think it's just gonna be, i think it's gonna be accepting that as a pretty good turn. three souls in my, hey, now that's a stem. three souls in my draw and they won't go. i'm getting my hand and it won't go. that one fell off after the nhl playoffs stopped. we gotta bring it back. it's up to us to bring it back, man.
42:47 excourage me first, literally exactly what i was hoping to draw, because then you can dredge. i thought we could bring back a severance, but never mind, man. how close are we to eight cards away? let's bring back two oblivions and a strike. i mean, when it works, it feels damn good. sure, intimidating helmet seems good, man. shroud seems good at video games maybe. so we're 100% gonna die here. we have no chance. there should be like a pop up here.
43:38 it looks like you're about to encounter a new boss known as the aeon glass. here's a little primer for the aeon glass. every six cards you play add a wither to your hand. wither. if it's... okay, unplayable. if this is in your hand, take three damage. he negates three debuffs. well, that's not good. certainly, like, specifically a hard counter to what we got going on in our deck, so to speak. like, in a manner of speaking.
44:15 everything costs more so the dredge has no value. we still purge 0 debuffs. not good. has to be done. another whither. 24 damage. check this out. taking none damage. invoking on the next turn. i got plays bro. dredge me. bring back a soul. bring back a doomed creator.
45:26 i don't really give a fuck what the next one is, so just give me a strike. create some doom. we got energy. whenever you apply doom, get block. it has to be done, unfortunately. come on. give me another doom creating card. somehow. another wither? i care not for another wither. doesn't bother me. give me a big dirge. set me up for a crazy oblivion turn next time. no escape. okay, well at least it applies doom. oblivion! this changes everything.
46:20 cuz now this comes out here, you play a soul, death's door is literally good. we're already basically not taking damage though, so i don't think you need it bro. fuck it, send it out anyway. cross the plane, wither plus one, doesn't bother me, doesn't bother me at all. huge turn, huge turn. handful of withers is gonna be good, bro, you sound like corner shop. handful of withers at.
47:01 45, it's a handful of withers at 45. a handful of withers at 1145. the meter doesn't really work. everybody needs oblivion. i love that song. it's a great song. fatboy slim, they knew what they were doing, man. they understood the assignment. ten times fatboy slim understood the assignment. that's one of them. there's gotta be a no escape, man. and then maybe an undeath? oblivion? undeath.
47:43 soul me. six more cards. dredge yet again. dredge me. give me the same motherfucking cards. don't even need any more block, bro. sculpting strike to make a wither ethereal and then take some doom. whatever. turn was literally easy, so what do i care? six cards till we draw. on the forty five. so close to tuning fork as well. whatever. we're still chilling. i need a soul turn.
48:51 well, that's probably not gonna happen. imagine though if we can get idle on to work by filling our hand with withers, man. wait, wait. we need a few more cards. if i play this, i want to, yes, i will have the enter, but then i gotta play another card. skurge, you're right, skurge. skurge gets us there. just do it, man. don't think about it too hard. decks changed a lot in a very short period of time though, that's for sure. 47 damage.
49:54 this might be the end for us, fair heroes. simply nothing i can do. barely die, but i die. honestly, any other boss it's over. literally they had to put a boss in the game. because you motherfuckers complained about the doorkeeper. now i've got to go up against the aeon glass. because you complained that the easiest boss was too hard. now they put a boss in the game that uniquely one shots our deck. way to go. way to go.
50:36 yeah, it's funner. don't bring that fucking fourth grade level discourse into here. it's funner.