the fnatic special - Bits and Banter [05⧸01⧸026]

Name: the fnatic special - Bits and Banter [05⧸01⧸026]
Uploaded: 2026-05-04
Channel: Librarian
Description: Full searchable transcript of "the fnatic special - Bits and Banter [05⧸01⧸026]" — 223 lines, each linking straight to that moment on YouTube.

Librarian2026-05-04

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0:00 guys, i screwed up. i drank a whole glass of cold brew concentrate thinking it was cold brew, not cold brew concentrate. and it's got me thinking that first of the month by bone thugs and harmony is the best song. i think it's the best song ever made. i've done that before. it's got me thinking that nobody's ever done it like bone thugs and harmony did it on first of the month. especially it hits different on the first of the month. heart rate check? oh damn 74, i fucked up.
0:30 wake up, wake up, get up, it's the first of the month. get up, get up. my friends were having a wonderful day. and i won't fight with my chat because it's the first of the month. what if we did first of the month but we did, we were all the bones. what if we were crazy bone and
0:53 who are the other bones? there's crazy bone for sure. past lives was a 2.5 star. what is it like to have no interiority? i won't fight with my chad cause it's the first of the month and i'll be streaming and dreaming about 90s movies again. watch clock watchers on the bike, thought it was a two star movie even though it had parker posey.
1:19 past labs was mid. no, you got it confused with materialist, nephew. materialist was mid. maybe even kind of bad. i'm not watching shit movies to fix my distribution. it's the may 1st is a crazy day on criterion. the first of the month is great. you get to listen to bone tugs and it's the criterion channel refreshes, which means you get to choose from an entire new crop of movies.
1:45 so i chose clock watchers as pac wan pic wan. i just found myself a little bit disappointed, but that's why i'm glad people like it. i'm not saying it's like an evil movie or whatever. i just thought it was kind of boring. guys, by the way, i have, um, i think i have horrible bursitis in my right arm. has anyone ever gotten bursitis just from playing counter strike badly? i think i literally need to get, uh, like an elbow brace or something like that.
2:12 like i have tennis elbow in my right arm, but i'm a lefty. you know how sad that is? plant your feet. what the stop throwing things in front of me, green! he he came. what the fuck? i shot him in the in the throw, bro. he should be popped! he should be he went he's taking dort. that should that should say damage over time. he's taking dort. oh shit. 92 oh, got mine, got mine. i don't even care. probably top fragger right now.
2:58 hey, how about this? anyone here a guided by voices fan? exit fragger! i wanted to... well, i don't want to say i wanted to kill you today. it's kind of... it's off of... wait, what are we rolling here, guys? it's off of propeller, so a lot of you might not know it, to be honest with you. i'm not sure how i feel about orange with the fuck ass andy serkis haircut. did you know that andy serkis animal farm came out, man?
3:23 i saw on letterboxd today, i saw someone reviewed it. it came out in 2025 apparently. maybe it played the festival circuit? also it has the lowest score i think i've ever seen as a consensus on letterboxd. it has like almost exclusively one and one and a half star reviews. i didn't know it was like, it's a kid's version of animal farm? where like apparently napoleon farts and shit like that? like it's not an animated adaptation of animal farm. like it's literally like four children.
3:53 it has a happy ending? well i got it i guess i just don't understand like why the fuck you would ever do that. you gotta make a move bro. faded. he knew! how did he know? how did he know? he didn't know. he didn't know he didn't know what he was getting in for. that's that's one thing for sure. he didn't know what he was in for. oh! my teammates were having a wonderful day and i won't fight with my team cuz it's the first of the month and i'll be dropping bomb and buying you til throwing flashbangs over mollies again. heart rate check.
4:28 87 holy fuck it's not supposed to go up rip to everybody in jungle right now. thanks for body blocking me bro one thing i was gonna say i was thinking about it this is a question for the ladies out there and i know you're going uh oh. oh, oh do ladies know that okay, so people can have good hair days. that's a given did you know they those of us with penises also have good cock days and bad cock days? oh
5:03 i'm not gonna lie to you, and this is not trying to be perverted, i'm literally just trying to be informational. there are days where you wake up and you look down and you go like, whose cock is that? and sometimes that's a good thing and sometimes that's a bad thing. sometimes you're like, i'm kinda... i got like a fleshier sorta hang than usual. and then some days you're like, who stole my cock? i know right, this is real. it's honestly some of the realest shit ever said.
5:35 can i say that's literally my teammates fault and he deserves to have died for that? i'll tell you what, i'll try not to injure my teammates when they stop running in front of me when i'm like crouched and scoped in. you got a warning? i mean they should warn him for moving like an idiot. let's just be honest, who did we kill there? who did we kill in that last round? you killed perp? okay nothing of value was lost.
6:11 you have left the buy zone. this is a message that pops up on your hud when you leave panera. i don't know, i just thought it'd be funny. doesn't really make any sense as far as i know. i'm a genius. i'm a fucking god. i actually might be insane. have i really just maybe i haven't been bad at counter strike, maybe i've just been under caffeinated. maybe i'm living another round right now. mankind has our setpoint for caffeine like 100 milligrams too low by default. wait, wait, wait, what's this vice article?
6:49 counter strike esports pros, we were all on adderall. i was talking about it with my discord because i was saying there's no way anybody on earth is neurotypical. the way that people talk about, the way that people who have adhd talk makes me think that nobody on earth could be neurotypical because they're always like
7:10 and i'm not making just wait till you hear the conclusion of the bit before you get mad. i'm not saying adhd isn't real. they're often saying something that's like, um... oh, i get like an email that i don't want to reply to, and i don't reply to it right away. it's so hard to be like non neurotypical. and i was like, this is stupid. there's nobody like that on earth that gets an important email and replies right away. and then one person in my discord ruined my life!
7:38 because they said, actually i got a prescription for vyvanse and that's literally what it was like. so yeah apparently like you just sort of like maybe it's like a wonder drug which actually i think i said it in the discord but we need to start adding the shit to the water supply man. we need to just start putting like a small dose. if vyvanse actually works like that they need to put like trace elements of it in the water supply.
8:05 and then you could catch me glug glug glug glug glug glug i'm about to become a data driven streamer. i'm processing my metadata and analytics to come up with data driven insights. i did not opt my cat. i have never opt my cat. jane dawson if he plays cs2. yeah, brother. yeah. he didn't see me. imagine it'd be a hell of a clip. ooh! ooh! tough luck, kiddo! shoo! ooh!
8:49 it's kind of crazy when you're not at a 30% win rate. you got adhd, be honest? no, i don't think so. i think that i'm not saying a vyvanse prescription wouldn't do me a little bit of good at a minimum, but i don't think i have i don't think i have disordered adhd tendencies. fuck bro took like pay to win smoke or something. literally thought that was my teammate for a second and a half. i hear them in jungle, bro. i told you i fucking heard them in jungle too. alright, yellow.
9:39 you got this. damn, wait maybe he's onto something. he's shooting through the damn ceramics man. that was not a bad game honestly. the clutch king, four clutch kills, second highest adr. you're a dad so shed some light on this. i saw you asking this yesterday. i have to tell you i'm pretty sure this is just a your dad thing.
10:13 why do dads love opening up the electrical closet and flipping random breakers on and off without warning their family? is it fun? i'm gonna tell you, that's your dad. i don't do that and my dad also never did that. i think that's literally just a i think you're learning something unique and idiosyncratic about your own father.
10:31 i mean, i'll flick the electrical closet a little bit, but only when the breakers flipped, man. or if we need to diagnose a technical issue, i'll be in there flipping some breakers, but... my dad got divorced and immediately set up motion activated lights in his house so he'd never have to flick a light switch? it sounds like your dad got on vyvanse, man. kind of based. nah, that shit would piss me off though, because it sounds like it's awesome,
10:59 but then a, i don't need a light to come on in a hallway just because i'm moving through it. you can keep that light off. and b, if i'm like girl rotting on the couch, just watching like clock watchers or some shit like that, i don't want the lights to turn off. and then all of a sudden i have to go like this to remind my room that i'm still here. no, man. i don't want that. clock watchers is great. your parker posey posting. i'm actually parker posey posing because i gave it a two out of five, but i i'll defend to the death there, right? to make the movie. but i just,
11:29 45 minutes into the movie i said, who cares? who cares about any of this? because i surely don't. who cares about this low stakes office drama? is it real? is it a reflection of real life? 100% it's a reflection of real life and it speaks to the transient nature of friendship in an office environment. but i'm sorry, i just don't care. i don't care who's stealing the damn pencil cups and the staplers.
11:56 parker posey's our little indie gem. are you is this trump? parker posey, we love her, we love her. they're saying parker parker posey, they're saying she has your friend's older sister energy. they're saying when you're in the ninth grade, she had your friend's older sister back from her first semester of college. and we mean it as a compliment, we do. i'm an only child. that might be the problem, might be the solution, might be the problem. oh my god, i'm out of sprays!
12:29 no, man. no. that means i've used a hundred sprays in my cs career. that's insane. it can't be possible. compilation when? guess i should help my team by getting a couple more angles out here, right? wow. wow. wow. wow. wow. wow. wow. wow. wow. wow. wow. wow. wow. wow. wow. wow. wow. wow. wow. wow. wow. wow. wow. wow. wow. wow. wow. wow. wow. wow. wow. wow. wow. wow. wow. wow. wow. wow. wow. wow. wow. wow. wow. wow. wow. wow. wow. wow. wow. wow. wow. wow. wow. wow. wow. wow. wow. wow. wow. wow. wow. wow. wow. wow. wow. wow. wow. wow. wow. wow. wow. wow. wow. wow. wow. wow. wow. wow. wow. wow. wow. wow. wow. wow. wow. wow. wow
13:20 bait bait, w bait, w bait. there's one there y'all be careful. they're gonna peak you here. fuck ass 2x zoom. my eyes ain't that bad. i had him too. can i say something? can i say nice try? can i say nice try? that was a pretty fucking good try. okay, that was a hell of a shot.
14:16 dude, these people are not in my elo. look at the way this guy's moving. that's not my elo, man. what are you doing in this game with me? literally the nicest try i've ever seen. literally the nicest try i've ever seen. holy cow. it sounds like you're being sarcastic. it's literally in text, okay? it's a failure of character to assume that because of our sick world,
14:55 any genuine message is insincere. literally got mine. can i get a rating on my joke? guy who confuses literary terms and french pastries. this book's got a lot of beignets. okay. i think i like it. i'll hold mid. you do the rest. got him? all right, well obviously we just don't peek that way. now we go palace and get two free kills. literally just showing the op has let them know
15:31 not to come mid. oh, fuck bro. what the fuck are we gonna do about this? 1v4? good. then it's a fair fight. got mine. now they rush palace through the flank. he's palace! okay, that was... the top of the head with the nova or the xm is kind of crazy. what a shot. w? wait, you first brother. oh, jesus! why would i look at him in the game to say something that he couldn't even hear? whoa, assist! let's go!
16:29 take him. this is the, this is the fella. this is the fella. oh my god! dude, the yellow's crazy! the yellow's insane! i hear them running mid. distracted. going up. going up. going down. they changed that in the update? nah, i knew it. they probably, they've been watching stream. yeah, yeah, come on. come on, just peek your little head out. oh!
17:42 enemy yellow thought they were safe when they swung on the palace door frame oh what a shame elegant streamer drinking caffeine from a glass that he keeps on his desk he is the best i look at all the solo queueers boop beep boop beep boop beep boop beep boop he's planting? ohohohoho
18:15 the bullseye. heart rate 62. oh baby. that ain't too bad. my eye did start to twitch for a second there. corey, corey, corey, we love you, corey. we love you. we got you in our sights, corey. we love you. 66,015. i don't think it's gonna do it, corey. i don't think it's gonna do it anymore. not
18:45 in this administration, kory. i don't think it's going to do it. chiblee, chiblee might be okay for a bit. we got to get through kory first. chiblee might be okay. huh? is apollo? huh? ain't no friend that i've ever heard of. do they, do they smoke palicin, huh?
19:05 my reaction when i find out bruce willis' freaky french girlfriend from pulp fiction is also javier bardem's freaky spanish wife in golden balls. anybody else know what the fuck i'm talking about? yeah, kinda. did people watch golden balls because i watched it? i feel like i might have been the best thing to happen for the marketing of golden balls since 1993. i did, so i apologize for that. because the movie is kind of... it's alright, but it's not that spectacular.
19:35 i'm watching nomadland this weekend. literally don't blame me for that. i'm telling you not to do that. bro, buying an awp for warm up on dust 2 is... hi guys. holy shit, it really does feel like an any percent. oh! i almost had it. i almost had the 100%. ships in the night fella. no, no, no. ships in the night. i said fucking ships in the night, bro. i can do this. motherfucker! i don't even have any sprays!
20:17 bro, can i say something? that one friend who's too woke. why is happiness a masculine word in french? hell of a shot, man. i can't even really be mad about that. one thing, i think it was actually a good trade because my grenade probably did 20 damage to five people, which is equivalent to getting killed. i literally did more damage to them than they did to me. i literally got mine. top fragging. that shot from yellow was crazy, man.
20:59 guys, we just throw a grenade long. they're gonna come long. guy who smokes pit, guy who smokes roof, guy who runs car without being seen and picks up four kills, guy who saw it got seen going car. i'm just looking at this leaderboard and i'm thinking this is a bad sign. util farming getting mad at team. i'm literally doing damage. 100 headshot percent, three rounds in. come on.
21:45 come on. guys, guys. why are three of us running long? i'm the guy with the grenade. let me go. i'm not you till farming. i'm getting out the grenade to do damage to them. and then they're body blocking me standing like literally a millimeter away from my back. so when i try to retreat, i have a wall behind me. hard rate.
22:19 89. i gotta slow my exhales. they're fucking coming. what's wrong with me? i need to see a vod replay to see what happened to my crosshair when he walked out. i think i had it perfectly placed. he walked out and i got scared, so i swerved to the right and then tried to pull it back in. i flinched! i got scared and i flinched!
22:49 going from unemployed back to university student might be what saved me from the brink of insanity. bro, that's going from unemployed to unemployed. what are you talking about? i'm not trying to be an asshole. i'm just stating facts. nothing wrong with it. that's kind of like the gentleman's unemployed. but still, i guess what i'm trying to ask is why are you trying to get one over on the unemployed people by saying you're not one of them, tunnel rat? i mean, that's just not good. that's just not a good turn of events.
23:31 what did i fucking tell you? he spawned! i mean, i hate to be this guy. this is litera fuck it, we go. kill him. bad start. if you're gonna go oh, i see a shadow! you're not him? bro, i'm literally look at purple! look at this fool! deflect him? popcrutch is not a real thing! if you buy guns and get kills with them, that's not a crutch. that's counter strike, bro. clutch. worth?
24:36 holy shit, we actually got out there. holy shit. holy shit, what's happening? because then he should have killed me 20 times. i had no health and he was just standing still. huge flash. let's do this. he's on site. the flick was kind of insane. holy cow. is the flick in the room with us? for me, a flick is when you get a kill, okay? you're gonna flash me out, i'm gonna go. you have to wait out you till though. no shot, he made pit. at 5k elo, no shot, he made pit. maybe car.
25:25 we peeked car. he's in pit, y'all. you plan, i'll cover you. what the fuck? i'm definitely dead. i'm dead a hundred times over. that's just... that much is very obvious. holy shit! mine is two for not checking. literally, there's five people on our team. i'm easily top fragging. why don't you go to like, purple's chat and say like, why didn't you check? you were entry and i got mine. i got mine. you know what? that was a bold peek. i actually respect that.
26:11 b main used to be the center of our scene. now b main's over, no one really goes there. we used to spawn beneath the catwalk bridge. sometimes you didn't even check there, what are the odds they'd be afk? i was covering bombsight when i got tapped from behind, i got punctured. awful? you literally don't respect the hold steady and that's why you're not gonna make it to heaven.
26:44 green is like a fucking sacrificial lamb. the chatter who made it! how the fuck did that fucking work? just play bomb. my germs. holy fuck, the dead angle flashes. it's so funny every time. i saw a shadow. nice shot, nice shot. alright, lost one already. bombs down on their corpse even though they weren't holding it. what do you think we're gonna do here, guys? this is the most i'm going to die around we've had this whole time. swing them.
27:33 okay, that was fucking awesome. that was fucking sweet. purple, what are you doing? it's fun! we need to do something! we're the t side! we need to force the issue! they were grabbing bomb? oh, okay. you know what? i vote no. the carry? oh, does that say what i fucking think it says? the carry?
27:59 imagine you off an adi right now. i don't even know what it would be like. corey, you ever wonder like if it would ruin your life if you got on adhd meds? like what if you took one adderall and everything just kind of sorted into place? because wouldn't that be a hard pill to swallow? not to like be glib, but yes, because we literally you would be like i've wasted like 25 years of my life at a minimum. this is part of the midlife crisis i've had for the last 20 years.
28:28 yeah, just like, you know, well, have i coped well enough with it for my whole life that i don't need the pills or am i struggling and i don't really realize it? that's how i think about it sometimes for sure. also, do i really want to confront that? and also, like, how is it fair that to get an adult adhd assessment, they tell you the appointments are in a year and a half. really? well, i tried to i tried to get an adult autism assessment.
28:58 and then the doctor told me we're booking for like summer of a year and a half out. and i said, well, jesus, really? yeah. and i was like, i guess it's not like serious. like, it's not like right. it's not like it's medically imperative. yeah. and i don't think it's progressive either. like, i don't if i if i'm on the spectrum, i don't think i'm like, you know, yeah, i don't think the symptoms are necessarily getting more present.
29:27 and they're probably like, he's doing all right. i'm already walking on my toes. yeah, that's probably the that's the other thing they were probably like, well, you're trying to get medical care for something that's outside of msp. so it seems like you're you can just pump the brakes a little bit. i don't know if this guy has missed four off shots on me at point blank. he's not very good. oh, damn, bro. that's batuu from ghost in the shell. benjamin dabbington. his name is benjamin dabbington.
30:00 that's actually awesome. hell of a knife though. and it's got like the blue tint on the serrated edge. damn, that's kind of awesome. oh, you saw, yeah, yeah, yeah, but you get a chance. and then run back to a and plant. okay, don't, oh my god. i don't even think he planted it for where he was going. well, i'm not going to damn him for that because that's how i play too, but he could have at least like, i don't know, like,
30:41 had his gun out at any time. they did you tell first they did you tell long? we didn't we didn't smoke. yeah, that's not gonna hit i see. yeah, i know i but a dude through a smoke so i thought they came along. i'm going long. long flank. okay, well he did to me what i did to the other guy so i can't was that long. you're still alive. no, no, no. all right. yeah, he was long voice. thanks for the assist.
31:19 corey, you should try the op. i know like it has negative aura, but it's actually incredible. i hate it. if you shoot them anywhere, they die. no more. how did i do 62 and three? you hit them, they're erased. he's coming out long doors, corey, careful. literally, yeah, it's literally the same thing as last time. i don't know what he's thinking, man. okay, purple has bomb and he's going b.
31:53 i just made a bunch of noise just to make noise not because i made a mistake. why did he plant without? they're diffusing. i mean, what are you doing, man? why are you solo planting the fucking? fuck. i didn't kill the guy on the exit and i thought he was going to kill me. i'm literally like most damage in the lobby though, so i'm not sweating it too much. bullshit smoke probably.
32:34 what the hell was that bro? we, corey, long i don't think we want to go. we have to trade. we have to trade team kills. you have to kill purple at the start of next round. i'll get him the round after that. oh, he killed you? no, no, no. he just, he threw a grenade off a dead angle and hit like four people on our team. great. great tap fire. king. great spray. you get them on the next round. i'll get them. i'll get them in the round after that. we can keep trading for like three rounds. who is it? purple.
33:07 yeah, but don't actually kill him. i'm just trolling. i'm gonna get one mid with my op and then i'm gonna get too long and then we're gonna plant b and they're gonna diffuse. one cost. okay, there's one. okay, prophecy fulfilled. drop in, double scope, get a kill. through the door, man. oh my god. i drew a circle around him. he's behind us, y'all. and i won't fight with my team cuz it's the first of the month and i'll be up and getting many kills again. he's going crazy.
33:51 it's literally the gun is too powerful, corey. well, there he is. good shot. really good shot. really good shot. i think i'm gonna buy the op. yeah, do it. you've been killing. corey, you gotta try it. have you ever used it or are you scared of it? are you scared of the energy?
34:33 i don't know. i don't like dying to it, so i don't want to use it. dude, that's the thing! you die to it, then you buy it and you get a kill with it and you go, fuck you. literally we own mid because of my op aura. mid guy, huh? i didn't see one mid actually. we threw a smoke that covered mid, strangely enough. oh, is it covered? no, it's not! yeah, he's mid. he's mid. i don't think my smoke did shit either, to be honest with you. i'll just pick him.
35:13 covered me. says big get shot in the side of the head energy. that's pretty good. got him. shot in the side of the head. he did get shot in the side of the head. now they have another awp. corey, this is your destiny bro. it's too expensive. fuck it bro. give me your ak. i'll give you this awp. no, i don't want the awp. corey, you can shoot. you can shoot with corey. you're good at aiming.
35:48 kory, you're good at aiming. too much pressure. it's literally gonna change your life in counter strike. that's fucked. never mind. i run this town. bad smoke. give us long doors. on a. kory, i got three kills off, no armor. it calls to you, bro. this is also t side off. yeah! you're carrying. the gun kills them in one hit.
36:29 everyone gets an op is it i don't know the ops versus three off. i don't have enough for an op man kind of fucked up. oh, oh, he dropped it. he dropped it. oh my king damn i gotta learn this smoke that felt so good that he literally said you need this gun. oh, i kind of smoked it there's one that came out of long doors kory
37:00 missed him. that's my bad. i missed him. they push out or yeah, he pushed out. yes. yes. he did oh my god. i am not prepared for this today he's clear. oh he had no idea. oh good job. we won we won we did you did oh
37:23 kory, i'm telling you, t side op is hard. ct side, you literally just pick an angle, hold it and farm kills. dude, dude, dude. i don't want, i don't want to be the evil man. yes you do. this game is about stealing other people's fun. i guess i got the nade for long doors. get ready. haters will say it's you till farming.
37:50 they're out by the way. there you go. yeah, long long. you see that damage bro? 55 55 50 71. yeah, the grenades. good on that for sure. are you watching tunnel? we got a guy watching tons. i'm watching the mid door. they're using our adhd against us. and i'm not gonna let it happen. i'm just gonna lock in.
38:16 i'm drawing from my own supply of vyvanse that my brain creates for me. this time they're gonna go long. i'm literally gonna get probably a double collateral at a minimum with my first shot. yep, one, two, two out long, two out long! go, go, go! i've abandoned my boy! i'm dead. i miss my guy and they all poured out long. are they on econ? no, bro! they killed me with the biggest gun i've ever seen! they do have ops. they took my op!
38:47 how much money i got? oh, enough. you got money. i'm up in tunnels. damn, i'm broke. here. i can't buy anything. you take that. can you give me yours then? one down. what did he say? good shit. i don't have comms on so i have no idea. dude, awp is really good.
39:22 corey, this would be a perfect time for you to opt down long tunnels. you could opt tunnels and you would see the light. you would be like, dude, it's not cheating. it's just that the gun is balance. because if you miss the first shot, you lose. but if you hit the first shot, if you fucking hit the first shot, holy shit, you're like a drug pusher.
39:52 i guess i'll fucking go fuck myself. seems like there's some hot shit at b. one more b? i'm awesome. that was crazy. sounds like another. i got one mid doors, like picked them. okay, that was that. okay, listen, kory, i'm not mad at you for your mvp there. but i'm a little upset at the game because there was some serious plays there. there were some incredible plays there that i think they they were disrespecting me on a little bit.
40:33 chat's keeping me honest, they said i shot two guys in the back. yeah, yeah, that's two guys, bro. yep, he's cat. let's go. corey, look at this! dude, that's like three mvps in a row, bro. one lung is dead. this is a good game, man. i apologize for anything negative i said about counter strike. this game's kind of awesome.
41:04 and send the area out who brought the nerd man, oh never mind i forgot where the feds forgot it checks out. it makes perfect sense. oh that was cat cat to cat. yeah, we got some issues cat we got some issues cat. oh game stresses me out man. all right check. oh
41:33 i can't i'm not even fucking with you my heart rate 67 right now. oh my god. that's the 79 kory my heart rate six seven. it's the greatest omen you could ever have that was scary too because i was not paying attention to that this is a huge fucking round
41:56 how's their purple? their purple is bottom fragging. i think purple is going to be like, don't go b, they have an awper. they're going to disregard them because he's like 6 and 20. and then they're all going to feed me b in tunnels. oh, a long out. or maybe our purple will smoke my angle and corey will easily win the game.
42:17 it's so, i'm not even saying this to be an asshole. it's so insane that you are bottom fragging. and yet i think you carried us through like the last half dozen rounds. you have like at least five or six mvps in the last 10 rounds. i've gotten a lot of kills, but not a lot of damage. bro, why are you smoking my ankle purple? bro, flash is b. i'm scared. two mid doors. i got it. i'm going for it. i'm going for it.
42:50 fuck that guy. i don't care about that guy. why would i give a fuck about that guy? bro, we have to push. what's this guy doing? what's this guy doing? huge. you have to do something. yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. purple, please don't smoke tunnels this time. oh, no, never mind. i don't care. that's your problem now. did purple smoke your angle again?
43:16 they smoked off the tunnels. okay, mid doors, it seems like. i'm watching mid doors, but it'll be after they push through. i'm in spawn. yeah. oh, we lost blue long. i got to go back and cover long. i've been shot in the side of the head from mid doors. one's cat. it's going to be a. oh shit. i think that's the dude who shot me in the side of the head. yeah. i have $2,700. literally, you can't rely on purple to do anything except smoke b doors for some reason. they're smoking the door for reasons that make no sense to anybody.
43:55 damn, yellow does have a hidden mickey bro. sorry? hidden mickey is when you see a mickey mouse somewhere you don't expect like at a disney theme park. i'm not up on your current lexicon. well, me neither. invented at runtime. got one. not my best round. not my best round. there's an up, down and spawn.
44:32 oh shit. i'll mid. i'll mid. oh, i gotta go pee really quick. i'll be right back. oh my god, are you kidding me? corey corey six seven. yeah, i still got knifed while planting the bomb. oh no i don't know
45:11 i don't know what happened, bro. i had 23 kills like that never happens. you did pretty good. i'm not like listen, yeah, there's no comms but like i don't want to talk to purple anyway to be honest. i'd rather just yell at him. like you literally chat you're like you're getting road rage and you're like why don't you just talk to the other driver? i don't want to talk to that idiot. what are you talking about? what am i going to be? i'm going to send him a constructive message, drive better, use your signal light like if they should have known man. i will purchase once again.
45:41 it's cheaper to buy this via the bundle because i already own one of the two games. that's crazy, man. librarian, did you like that comment? they tried to insult me, but they put an extra significant figure on the cents, which indicates that they not like us. instead of saying 15 cents as 0.15, they put 0.150, which is just an insane way to denote 15 cents of value. that ain't the way we write that here, bro.
46:17 they should at the very least if you want to mess it up, put a comma or something. i'm not going to accuse you of being french. that's aspirational, bro. that's where agnes varda is from. but .150? now i did fuck it up. literally you just try to insult me now you're acting like we're friends. i don't know you. very reprehensible energy to fold that easily under zero pressure whatsoever.
46:43 okay, can i say something? it was a great gag. i apologize that the screen was black. when i booted the game and said, are you feeling lucky? i said, yes, it flipped a coin. it landed on a red face and said, unlucky, we're closing the game. that's awesome. that's actually an incredible bit.
47:22 oh, yes, yes. and that was close too, man. get help gamble hotline. do you think this just puts you in their discord where they tell you how to gamble better? no, that would be too gauche.
47:42 hello, enel. how are you? i'm good. how are you? i'm good. i'm excited for whatever this is. i have no idea what this game is even about. i think it's literally just in the name. i think you just gamble with your friends. it's perfect. it's sending a... i don't know if it's a great message to send on the first day of aapi month, but you know what? i'm down to spend a good time. wake up. wake up. it's the first of asian american pacific islander month.
48:10 so cash your checks and get up. i'm gonna make this joke again later, which is embarrassing for all parties involved. no, no, no. let's punch it up right here. yeah, yeah, yeah. i think it's pretty big of me to be giving these smaller streamers a chance, you know what i mean? it's okay. they're probably nervous, and that's cute, honestly, but i've been where they've been before, you know? i like that. i don't even know who's gonna be here. are we friends on steam? probably not, right?
48:40 i don't think so, but i'll send you my friend code. cuz i need you to join the game, so i've got kind of like a visual gag for you. oh hell yeah. got a bit of a visual gag, but it requires wait wait wait, but which one is okay. a visual gag that i just am i window shopping at the snm store? hey! hey!
49:03 kinda disgusting. okay, gummo reference is really good. do you ever feel like you get stream sniped in mahjong? and if so, do they start to just play like baby hands to beat you?
49:15 um for no one can out baby hand me, but i and like i believe in other people's goodness but every time i am in a lobby with someone whose name i recognize. i'm i i don't trust anyone i don't trust any of these mf errs like you can say that you're not watching the stream but i i don't know if i believe you and i don't know if that's small of me or normal but i
49:40 no, you're valid. i'm paranoid for sure. what's crazy is that my friends convinced me to stop playing counter strike because they said i was getting stream sniped in every game and then i started solo queueing on stream and started winning and top fragging every single round. librarians got their work cut out for them. they them librarian? i got in trouble for that earlier this week. i've never ever and this probably is more of a
50:04 mark on my character, but i've never had a friend group call the discord five minutes before the start time we're all indifferent out here for sure different world i wasn't prepared. did i just add someone random air cutes or is that's me? hell yeah
50:23 nice to meet you, et cetera, et cetera. i would have thought you would have known each other by now. i mean, i farmed bloodwitted for content already. so in a way we do. that's right. you did it for the mahjong! wait, what way? oh, sorry. i accidentally removed you. i'm sorry. i reviewed your mahjong game with northern line. so sorry.
50:46 oh my god, i don't remember how that went. i think it was bad. i'll stop you i won yeah, but it wasn't richi mahjong so it's like does it really even count it was riki was gonna tell ah you know what? sometimes you just swing really hard. yeah balls not there. you know what though you were on controller it's way worse. it's harder on joy con. i went to so many i
51:14 chinese hotel rooms, they just have a mahjong table like an automatic shop like a nice one so sick and we would just make it shuffle and deal out all the the tiles for like 20 minutes and then push them back in and then yeah yeah, that's so that's we we have one and that's basically what i do with it i tried to add lud and it said you can't invite this guy. oh
51:36 you can't be friends with this guy. only the cool people can add. wait, i'm coming in. i'm sorry. wait, maybe i opened the game and it said, are you lucky? and i said yes, and then it flipped a coin and it shut the game off. yeah. wait, mine didn't do that. yeah, i was really unlucky here. i'm just fucking with you. yay! you gotta come out of your womb. what are you? what are we? whoa, guys, what's going on in here? this is crazy. it's crazy in here. oh, hats. oh, we don't we're too poor.
52:07 what's going on in here? oh, where are you? oh my gosh? you're the best drawer wait the piss drawers the tub oh no no no it's changed the color oh
52:23 i want the green. i want the green. you can change your color in the piss pool. they didn't give a fuck man. it took so much practice to get the to pick the blood color through the wall. i was watching you dude on stream before. no, no, no, no. i think we got to go out and gamble. wait, wait, wait. this might be peak. check this out. oh hell yeah. how'd you do that? emo wheels on r.
52:51 smoke whoa salute they probably spent a whole day on this wait wait that looks like the white kory oh this is good kory's like we need this in vr and
53:21 wait, they got cinema too? this is this game has everything man. oh my goodness. i thought we were on. damn. who are these guys? oh, this is this is genuinely gambling. yeah, yeah, i think so.
53:39 six i've never i've never been to a casino in real life. so this is this is this is fucking bro. i'm all in guys i'm broke. i'm broke. can we bet together or do we have to watch someone singularly do this? i don't know i want y'all oh wait, we have to choose one
54:02 yeah, that makes sense. let's go yaro. oh my god, yaro! it's uma masumi! holy shit! bro, we won! i got all the credit for your game. i got all the credit because i pressed the play button. we won, we won. we share money, we share money. oh, okay, great, great, great. i felt bad. fucking bro, i'm all in. okay, 50. 300 bucks. i'm loving this bet. spin it. just a straight block. fucking spin it, bro.
54:31 guys i was one big guy one big oh you did oh god
54:58 i cut our money in half, but then i doubled it. so i'm ahead. i'm way up. we're back. we're back. i got the jackpot. i got 900 bucks. all right, we can slow our roll. we can slow our roll a little bit.
55:28 i'm all in. i'm all in. come on, come on. spin faster, spin faster. i'm all in. come on, come on. come on, put me faster, faster. a little more, a little more, a little more, a little more, a little more of this, a little more of this. does anyone want to get the other two machines?
56:08 bro, i could get off of this machines hot bro, bro. get off of the machine saw your blog give me huge thank you. thank you guys. i was big up on it when we see stats after this. i'm mvp wait, we lost okay, hold up i gotta smoke about this. oh
56:39 yeah, if you kick the habit. did i click? no. nope. oh no. worth. does anyone know if you can eat mint leaves whole? yeah, you can. i can see your stats. oh, you're seeing the graph? oh, jesus christ. oh my god, you guys fucking suck! okay. ryan is mvp. some of us were acclimating to the smoke filled halls of the casino, okay?
57:02 oh no. oh no. about to be killed of mice and men style? oh dude. oh no we're dead. oh we gotta dig our own grave man. get in. this is a f*** scene. brutal. oh those are party bags. yeah they're gonna kill us. i feel like this exact scene. what is it like joe pesci?
57:26 no, it was way more horrible. it was i shouldn't even bring it up okay! oh no! this is based on a true story, real tragic shit. i'm ready. what's up? wait, is this the devs? wait, can you do that? this is definitely the dev hacking into our thing, right? dev, if this is you say a slur. no, don't do it! otherwise you can't be sure. kate, how did you get a gun?
57:57 okay, your gun has flown out of the map. our stuff, our stuff. yes. all right. okay. okay. all right. i'm going straight to it. i'll get your time machine doesn't work. we use you songs time machine that is back huge before you use this. let's collude. yeah, let's collude on roulette. yeah. yeah. big. oh, we do two big roulette bets. yeah.
58:27 so why not just put you can put everything on one number? oh shit, i just used my time machine! i'm so sorry. oh my god, you saw? oh my god, oh my god, oh my god. can i kill him? can i kill him? wait, it was zero. it was zero. don't go all on red, go all on a number, man! we got a time machine! take a risk! isn't it zero? we just know it? true. wait... wait! ludwig, you fucking genius! spin it, use the time machine, and then run it back!
58:55 oh yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah. let's spin it for like let's spin it for like let's just spin it for like just red to do our daily. yeah yeah okay huge. they're not listening they're not listening okay okay and then i'm gonna use it. rewind time. i've used it all in on 28. all in all in all in.
59:19 what the fuck? i don't think we have any more time machines man! fuck it run it again. i'm going back on 28.
59:34 we have to go red. motherfucker. okay, we're no. jesus christ. i won. i literally won. good. we got to play high risk high risk. 670 oh my god. just hit just hit.
1:00:03 motherfucker, man. motherfucker. guys, i gotta win it back. this, this, that screen is gonna be fucked up. i gotta win it back. corey, i've lost all of our money, man. i've lost it all. i need to win it back. i need to win it back right here. oh, motherfucker, man!
1:00:34 no, we don't kill anybody wait wait wait wait wait we just win it back there we go 3x and then we double it we go again we double it give it to the next guy yes, it's been again. that's even better than the jackpot ludwig is gonna spend all of our money as soon as we get to x2x
1:00:58 send it, send it! no, it's too late, he was too fast! oh, how is it? the money's just disappearing so fast. oh my god! yes! okay. ryan's coming back.
1:01:18 nooooooo! you should honestly shoot me. i lost everything about myself in the casino.
1:01:39 i'm back. i'm back. yes, yes, yes. no, no.
1:02:07 wait, wait, wait, he's back. he's back. we can make it. we can make it. we just need a couple good spins. at any given moment you're just three doublings away from matching elon musk net worth. oh my gosh.
1:02:39 wait 17 seconds start shooting eyeballs shoot eyeballs. i didn't even i was using my bad eye to gamble.
1:03:02 my god, look at this. look at this, genuinely look at this. i made it in the positives. my god, we won. my god, we did. corey has no mouth. corey, you have no mouth and you in the game you sound like. corey's mouth off. some of us were heroes that volunteered to be shot so that we could spend it on duck race. no, you're chill. you're chill.
1:03:31 but i can't smoke for some funny don't even watch this this graph is so fucked up man
1:03:49 literally the day ended as i was having my come up. the day ended as i was having my come up. jesus christ. i can't hear you. i don't know what you're saying. no man, no. maybe you just don't have a mouth forever. corey, we don't know what you're saying, man.
1:04:14 kory kory kory we can't hear you he doesn't get it when he was attention uses baseball bat and hit them i
1:04:47 sir, sir, what the fuck just happened? no, i didn't i bet it and then someone knocked me while i was mid black jack hand. all right now i lost it.
1:05:13 i'm back. i'm back. the money go. double it. double it. i don't have the money to double it. i don't have an show. you were here the whole time. we were over the quarter that we needed. minimum bet 54. all right. we have $40. what happened?
1:05:45 in invalid bet amount, minimum 45. guys, we can't play any games! you need 45 to bet on anything! we're back! g gamble, gamble, gamble! okay, i just i won big, i won big! let's chill, chill, chill, chill. we got a we got a stash to work with, we got a stack, we got a stack.
1:06:10 i got patience. it's called hitting on a 14. all right, not the way i would have phrased that. no one's ever going to want to play pudge again. fuck it. max bet. invalid bet. six, we have $6. guys, we have $6. shoot me. shoot me in the skull. someone needs to get shot right now and it probably should be the last place person. you're welcome. you're welcome. thank you. kate, i need to deal with getting shot. motherfucker, man. that's my god.
1:06:45 capture a winning player for extra profit. i was winning so much and now we have zero
1:07:15 no, no, there's a way, there's a way. shoot kate's eye. wait, why am i? why me? we have to go fast! we have to go fast! you shot her body. you shot her body. okay, no, no! go to the wheel! go to the wheel and go all no! you can't shoot me! we can win! wait, wait, wait, wait. where's my what am i missing? your body! you're missing your body! i'm missing my body, what the fuck?
1:07:43 go to the wheel, go to the wheel, gamble it all, i'll take your picture after we win. thank you, thank you, cody. thank you, cody. it's cinema, we're gonna win. do it again, go again, go again. okay, that's not bad, that's not bad. oh shit, oh shit. you guys are monsters. i can't believe ludwig, ludwig, shoot my body, dude. i can't even walk, it's a bombing camp. next time i'm shooting ryze body off. why didn't you do anything?
1:08:10 we were we were so good! we were there! we were at wallpoint 8k!
1:08:16 the amount of times that we were at six was sobering. holy shit. you guys suck at gambling, can i just say? have you ever been to a casino or something? it's a line straight down. what are you doing? throw her head in the pit. let's get onto a new day.
1:08:41 i want to know what kory thinks about this. wait, i want to do my you're the smartest guy i've ever known, walt. and you can't see they've made up their mind ten minutes ago. this sucks! can you guys not play with me? i'm not gonna throw up real life. kobe! stop it! stop it! i can't understand you at all. i'm gonna fucking throw up. oh my god, i hate you. i hate you so much.
1:09:09 if you didn't run when i told him to shoot your eye out, you wouldn't have lost your body. i said shoot you songs eye. i was the only one who was making money in the room. 1.6 kind of egregious 1.67 you know what i mean? 1.67 i think we should shoot the body part of the negative the most negative player. wait, that's actually genius.
1:09:35 i love the idea that if you're the most minus, you have to donate your body part because then we'll keep each other honest. that's what i've been saying. that's good. you think you can shoot the arms off or something? get out of jail. this is okay. we got to play martial arts sometimes. this is the vibe. smoking? yeah, i don't know. there's something nice about it. you have never been to a casino and now you're telling me to what the fuck? i don't know. ragdoll.
1:10:05 ohhhhhh oh yeah. hate me like one of your french girls. dude, dude, dude! oh yeah, that was scary. stop. dude, dude, watch me, watch me. okay, no, no, that's too real. it's too real. guys, guys! it's way too real. it's... oh my god. i i know you like that, right? is that what it looks like? get a room! no way! we were in a room! okay, i know exactly how the fuck i'm gonna play this one.
1:10:39 then we get our tickets, we use our tickets to buy a time machine. yo!
1:10:54 i mean the sounds are incredible. why is it so hard to get a jackpot in a slot machine, bro? i'm in for a dollar each. i want to get our bonus objective. it's true. oh my god. wait, i can't even bet a dollar. oh my god. we're back. we're back. wait, wait, wait. collude, collude. guys, guys, guys. we got a minute. we got to double our money.
1:11:22 alright, you guys have no mouth. you guys have no mouth. i'm all in. we went on seven or eleven? oh, this is this is awesome. oh! stop gambling! stop gambling! stop gambling! stop gambling!
1:11:53 hi, how's it going? you guys all right. you've all lost body parts oh how do i steal the ball i
1:12:29 imagine though, hey, hey, hey, hey, i'm through, i'm through, i'm through. wow. by the people who made the glass game. carry the glass? yeah. yeah. white chocolate, white chocolate. that's literally goaltending bro. yeah, right. yes. what the heck?
1:13:04 are we like gambling? we're not going to tear our acl. what is this game? this is so creepy. oh, fuck. oh, shit. oh, shit. he got it. damn, he's got a dribble it too. fuck, it's so... nobody's ever scored. are you gonna go outside? oh, damn. he's doing some globetrotter shit. can i double bounce? oh, he was right there. he's cleaning the damn glass. what the fuck is this guy?
1:13:38 corey has no mouth man. what happened? on my screen not even fucking with you on my screen. that's no mouth. hey
1:14:03 i have a little bit of money. bro, bro. hey, i have $150 to work with before i get when is enough enough, man? wait, so this game's actually just gambling? the realization hits everybody differently. i thought there was gonna be something else. i like it. why'd you say it so negatively? you should be saying, wait, this game's actually just gambling? are you double fisting? bro, i'm trying to quad fist, but people keep taking my machine.
1:14:33 where's my fucking jackpot? bro, this one's hot. i'm all in. oh, come on. ooh! fuck. i lost my money.
1:14:53 i think i'm getting shot. maybe not, maybe not. check again, check again, check again. wait, this one's hot. i'm all in. oh my gosh. oh my gosh. stop, stop, stop. stop, stop.
1:15:19 yeah, bet one on all the slot machines try to get 10x this is awesome
1:15:43 this is incredible! i'm absolutely suffused with dopamine right now. fuck it bro, i can't believe it's nighttime. how long were we in there? kate couldn't help but notice your last... i was already dead! what is that?
1:16:11 you get extra tickets cuz we did so well. yeah. yes, man. wow. we really didn't need our carry. let me go. let me go to the casino. the machines are hot. i don't want them to take my machine.
1:16:37 what is it? it's a microphone? i cracked it. what is it? bonus draw. i used it on it. oh my god. go get in there. get in there. press one. we gotta go. that was really funny. so you song bought it. ludwig opened it. squeaks picked it up and then used it. who's going for something heavy? what the fuck is that? oh, yeah.
1:17:07 cast a buff around you so we get bigger wins. oh you know, i'm a dreamer but my heart is cold. i had a runaway hi wait
1:17:32 holy shit! holy fuck. oh my stop gambling! stop gambling! wait, i have to because i'm a loser if i don't. i lost half my money. one more spin, i swear. one more spin. oh my god, he's lost. we can afford it. we can afford it. 290. no more. no more. no more. no more. oh no. oh no. oh no.
1:18:01 there's no reason to stay we even got our bonus objective. we can probably leave early. yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. it would be so devious if they didn't let you leave till the day was done. there's no way we would have the impulse control. the casino where they lock the doors. so this is i prevent losing? yeah. i don't know how that works. let's go. where's the wheel?
1:18:28 okay, keep talking. i'm so drunk. can you push the bug? can you push the bug? oh shoot. no, i pushed the bug. link, stop gambling!
1:18:53 that was supposed to be me. what are you saying? that was supposed to be me. i think she's having a stroke man. i can't.
1:19:06 are you okay? she's wrong bro. she's drunk. oh your voice was so crazy hunter the jackpot hunter oh, oh, oh
1:19:27 kory, why don't you stand in the middle of the slot machine and then use your statue? we'll all max bet. ooh! okay, okay, max, max, max. max, max. use it, use it, use it, use it, use it. i'm raising it, i'm raising it. oh my god, oh my god. holy shit! yes! oh my god, i'm doing it, i'm doing it! it's over, it's over, it's over, it's over! oh, stop, stop, stop, stop, stop, stop! it's over, it's over, it's over! oh, okay. it's over. whoa!
1:19:57 holy shit. oh my god. wait, what happened? you said what happened? i was just watching my number look bad. squeaks, you missed an hour of us going all in, losing, shooting someone in the face to get 500 bucks. immediately someone else spends the money and loses it. so we have to shoot somebody else in the face to get 500 bucks.
1:20:22 holy shit
1:20:46 yeah, i think it's when i use the golden spin and that might appeal while you singing i can increase the mass also the wheel we can go like jesus christ, let me think about this second floor the second floor. oh
1:21:10 let's go everyone chill chill chill cuz we got to scope it out first to see what kind of games they got five floors okay, okay, okay? holy shit what the fuck is this
1:21:40 no restraint restraint. no, fuck it. i'm all in. i'm gonna raise my statue. i'm gonna sing on the wheels. i'm gonna reach out and grab. i'm cashed out. okay, i don't know if that did it.
1:22:11 oh, you did get the win there. wait, kay, what happens when you get drunk? your winnings increase? increase profit. kay, i actually trust you 100% on this side of the penguin game. it has a chance to fall every time you step, but the further it gets, the more money you get.
1:22:33 uh, okay okay. you just click the middle of the bet and then like with every step profits increase. i think we should do minimum. okay maybe half? let's do half. yeah send it. okay. step. step. oh you're doing it! you're doing it! okay i think we should cash out. smart, smart, cash out. and then go again. oh my god, i want so much money. ryan i want so much money. i know, i know, i know, go again you got the hot hand. stop, stop, stop!
1:23:03 oh my god, oh my god, step dude. why the fuck would you do that? we should obviously that's all right happens it happens keep it up oh my god, oh my god, i think i should stop we won we won we're clear. we're clear. oh my god. oh my god. oh, hell yeah i won
1:23:34 oh you can mask the balls. we have enough, we have enough. we have enough. we have enough! what are you doing you salmon? you're creeping! stop it! stop it! stop it! stop it! stop it! stop it! stop it! stop it! stop it! stop it! stop it! stop it! stop it! stop it! stop it! stop it! stop it! stop it! stop it! stop it! stop it! stop it! stop it! stop it! stop it! stop it! stop it! stop it! stop it! stop it! stop it! stop it! stop it! stop it! stop it! stop it! stop it! stop it! stop it! stop it! stop it! stop it! stop it! stop it! stop it! stop it! stop it! stop it! stop it! stop it! stop it! stop it! stop it! stop it! stop it! stop it! stop it! stop it! stop it! stop it! stop it! stop it! stop it! stop
1:23:54 i'm up, i'm way up, i'm way up. let's stop our money. i won this money for us and you're still working away. okay, i'm out, i'm out, i'm out, i'm out. i left, i left, i left, i left, i left. we did it, we did it, we did it. we don't have a gun. i think someone has one. wait, what the fuck? what the fuck?
1:24:14 he's right here. he's right here. you have to stop. i think someone has to. he went back in. let's go. he's right here. he's right here. stop. stop. you need to stop. no. i'm actually gonna. okay. okay. okay. okay. stop it. i'm out. i'm out. i'm out.
1:24:44 they do need to make a way to drag someone out like if two people could team up and drag a person out of the casino wait, it probably is the baseball bat. you're right. oh
1:25:07 oh, ow. what the fuck? oh, and i can pick up kate. hello, kate. and now you guys have kate. so that's our strat. how do you pick someone up? oh. wait, you need the bathtub. we're going the wrong way. it's, hey, we're, uh, i'm not used to you gripping me in front of so many people. we're not going gambling. they're not even going to notice you're gone.
1:25:37 are you breaking me? i'm just testing the bat. i'm just testing the bat. no, i'm not. i'm letting go i'm letting go
1:25:54 that means you have to win. yeah. hey, we need to double our money. but the penguin game, kory, i'm pretty good. you got the alcohol, whatever you want to play. let me hack the keypad so we can increase the max bet. oh my god. yes. the only thing is if it goes wrong.
1:26:13 okay, here we go. corey corey corey. i'm going up immediately every man for themselves. i'm gonna hack the keypad on this one you ready holy shit, we can bet we can bet three grand on this beast go go go go go go go again go again
1:26:44 oh my fucking god, i'm a whoa who had the best it's a 1.6 here
1:26:55 i'm winning money? huge, huge, we're back, we're back. i don't understand this game. go, go, go, go, go, you're still drunk! you're still drunk, there's still hope! i'm drunk! wait, wait, wait, wait, what? what happened to our money? did you go all in on the penguins? what?
1:27:18 ryan braved me. ryan braved me. we have zero dollars. there's got to be a way to get a little scratch. there's got to be a way to get a little scratch. wait for this to die down. wait, can i have a baseball? can you hit ryan? i didn't do anything! i didn't do anything!
1:27:46 you were drunk. i actually the last last we should put squeaks in charge of the gun because he was the highest earner in the last run. i feel like that shows he's all allow that. i'll allow that. okay, i like but don't okay. squeaks i want you to know don't it would be so funny if you just shot me it would be so funny. oh my god.
1:28:14 i'll show i'll show some restraint. it's rng. it's rng. it's like body part that you lose. okay, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, don't bet, don't bet. watch this. okay, you just won a ton of money. yeah. take that and triple it. oh my gosh, really? yeah, yeah. or lose it all. who loses to rock miters? yes! we're rich! i didn't even get to gamble, dude. wait, i didn't get to use my gun.
1:28:43 that's good, that's good. wait, you can gamble here. wait, wait, wait. but new innovation in casino devilry? put some tables outside. waiting for your uber? exactly.
1:29:12 that's so embarrassing. my god, it's always spinning me. this is gonna be funny as fuck.
1:29:43 oh dude perfect i'm playing like the phillies
1:30:12 yeah, yeah, pitch it to the net, i'm curious. i hope you didn't buy a new mystery box. kate, i couldn't. someone literally fucking killed me before i could. i threw away the mystery box. how did you get the mustache? what is that fucking? what is going? hey, hey, hey, wait, you got a beard from that? what are you talking about? i can't. i can't see myself.
1:30:46 are you guys trolling me? that's where the tickets went! you look like you have a pair of meta ray bans at home. damn, we made it! we made it!
1:31:00 we're not we're not over anymore
1:31:23 we're back, we're back, we're back. we're clear. we're clear. we're clear. we're clear. we're clear. we're clear. we're clear. we're clear. we're clear. we're clear. no, no, no, no. you stop stopping. yeah, yeah, no, no, no. okay. i was thinking. i think i'm 20. you said. wait, now we got too much money. we got to gamble a little bit of this. i need the baseball. i need the baseball. i go again. i go again. i'm feeling good.
1:31:50 motherfucker, man. no, i'm gonna win! i'm hot!
1:32:11 i think just everyone gets to bet no more than $1,000 what the fuck
1:32:41 i'm guarding the shop for the igl. i'm guarding the shop for the igl. this weird. thank you. keeps eating us. shouldn't shouldn't let big guy be. all right, you can go in. you can go in. okay. reroll. reroll really? these suck ass.
1:32:58 oh, hey the prevent your loss is actually pretty good. that's amazing. how did you do that? i'm gonna naruto run into it. if you want to reroll now you can. i don't think so. oh my god, dude guys, it's like it's the it's the speedrun cytology. oh shit, there's another bat! there's another bat! get the bat! oh fuck i was gonna it was gonna faint a little bit.
1:33:22 fuck let me go gamble i just want to gamble i just want to gamble i don't think i saw you i'm not sure i'm not sure you can sell your body parts here. oh
1:33:42 oh, for tickets. for tickets you can body shred. oh, what'd you do? are you shredding? wait, get in here, get in here. all right, but if i put you in, if i go in there with you, please just take my eye. yeah. i think you actually died, dude. oh fuck, no! no! he's in, he's in, he's in! get up, get up! oh my god, oh my god. no, no, no, no!
1:34:12 i wanna make sure it's right, i'm doing eye. what a surprising eye, there's only two eyes on that guy. okay, okay, okay. so you can spend tickets to bring it back as well. go back in, go back in. if i go blind, i'm gonna freak out. no, you're right, you're right. look at that. so if we got good items, we could go all in and then buy back our body parts later. yeah.
1:34:43 my god you saw i think these are bad. i think these are bad we're taking his eyes get open it's open it's waiting for him. it's messed up with the power that's awesome, that's awesome. come on out buddy. what are the flies motherfuckers you? oh
1:35:09 that's so sweet. oh, and the almighty cot shell of a baseball bat. very funny. luckily, nothing like that will ever happen to me, so i don't have to worry about the ramifications of that. can someone give me my eye back, please? oh, we have nine tickets now. i mean, we're not going to take your eye and then not spend the tickets. let's be realistic here. unfortunately, i think your eye is going to get rid of his mouth for another second.
1:35:39 you're okay, you're okay, you're okay, you're okay, come on out. fuck it, pick him up, put him in the car. really funny that you sold me for parts, everyone. guys, he's getting big designs, i think we need to take his body.
1:36:04 you wish you could go back to when you had two eyes. hey, you saw get the meat grinder. yeah, yeah, yeah. quick before they spend all the tickets. yeah, my eyes. no, not another half my eyes, my eyes, my eyes. get in there. get in there. i'm getting in there.
1:36:34 the pedersen posting? what? oh my god, you took his mouth. get it, get it, get it, get it, get it. yeah, all right, that's really funny though. that's really funny. oh dude, so many tickets to spend. then throw his head in the basketball net. you guys, your eyes match.
1:37:03 oh my god, oh my god, right you're a monster wait wait wait from downtown i don't think you can throw them that far can you yeah wait, wait, can you crouch here and i'll jump on your head? yeah. yeah. yeah, i can boost you oh, fuck yeah. oh, okay. okay he's kind of making a little bit of noise he's probably saying do it do it
1:37:36 that's what the timber wolves did to the nuggets man
1:37:55 okay, do you want your eyes or your body? you kind of got a pick. my body, you dick! alright, welcome back! hey! can you hear me? yeah, yeah, we can hear you. we can hear you. okay, great use of aapi month everyone! hey, hey, what are you doing? it's over. dude, i'm doing one, the saddest single pachinko ball. it's over again. oh my god, what's this? i have no idea.
1:38:23 apparently, we win those. it's just over under. all right, i'm in for max bet. you're threatening me with a gun while it's happening. that's so lucky. guys, i just won $9,000. okay, well, i got one now. you shot him down here. well, i'm down here. i'm down here. oh my god. don't play a blackjack game for a thousand if you fail. i gotta shoot you in the sky.
1:38:53 holy fuck, holy fuck my heart my fucking heart guys. we're almost there. we need five grand. oh shit, oh shit lock in you're still the negative you sorry you got to do three grand. oh
1:39:20 my heart rate went up to 94 my heart rate went up to 94.
1:39:39 how did you save $70,000? i did a half max bet on blackjack immediately got blackjack.
1:39:53 he's in the elevator behind you bro. you saw him. come on. make it stop. make it stop. shoot him with a gun. i'll play one more real quick. i won, i won. go, go, go.
1:40:26 this is awesome. this is awesome. oh, did i do that? okay, okay, okay. holy fuck! oh yeah, can i have my eye back? can i have my eye back? can someone help me get my eye? can i have my eye back, please?
1:40:56 oh my god, you spent it before i could buy my eye
1:41:13 squeaks, do you have like a trench coat now? squeaks is gonna be in a tuxedo now. wait, somebody ragdoll. somebody ragdoll. let me see this guy. take me over to this guy. i wanna see him. dude, squeaks, what the fuck? i meant the whole line. that's messed up, bro. that was yussa's eye. you bought it on his suit. you spent it on his suit. pick him up, pick him up. i'm not... i'm not...
1:41:41 yeah, yeah. i'm all in. fuck, i'm not all in. that's way too much money. he did it immediately. all our money. did he win? i don't think he won. what is going on, man? corey, i haven't played yet. i haven't played. fuck, 13 versus 9, i hit. it's all right, we win it back on the next one.
1:42:14 huge, double the bet. what? okay, okay, okay, okay. it took your mouth. shit. what did you take? what did he take? i shot your body. somebody pick me up please. what happened to ryan? he shot my body off cuz i lost 30 grand to blackjack. my god.
1:42:46 i'm making money because you keep moving me away are you holding me?
1:43:15 i'm gonna thank you. okay watch this. this works. under, under, under, under. ryan. oh my fucking get out of my way. it's obviously under! under! oh my god, oh my god. oh shit. oh shit. guys we gotta make a big play though. yeah. we have zero dollars.
1:43:44 no, not we go down to $0. it's easy. it's easy. everyone give me your eye. give me your eye. all we have to do put it up to 99.999 and then bet on over. i shot your mouth accident i missed. my gosh. can you smoke into my mouth?
1:44:06 i think our game crashed. wait, that's should we make a new lobby where we kind of screwed on this one anyway? i think i'm tapped on time either way. the timing was pretty good. i think literally the dev tried to talk in our lobby and crash the game. i think he did.
1:44:39 i also heard that. all right, call it. damn. how'd we do? things got a little out of control towards the end there. in the heat of gamble. i realize you kind of just need to shoot people's bodies, not their mouths, because they can still go all in with no mouth.
1:44:57 bro, you go all in with no body. i was gambling just when she was holding my head. yes, she was holding her head like you were mini me or something. did anybody else have their body parts harvested so that squeaks could look like a register for the president? did anybody have that happen? yeah, but then we went eye for an eye, dude. you'd freaking drive me in and out. you'd take my eye for what?
1:45:19 and then the whole world is blind. really teaches you a lesson. i can't believe riot lost 50,000. that's a good freaking game. it's pretty fun. pretty silly. maybe we could play more in the future together.
1:45:37 let's go. thank you so much for coming and playing with me, guys. i appreciate it. of course. thanks for the invite. thank you so much. thanks for the games. thank you. hope you guys have a wonderful day. likewise. later. bye bye. i didn't really have much of a choice, but it was still fun.
1:46:01 i will send you over to my wife's stream. what's your cs rank, chiblee? i'm not even joking. chat, tell chiblee how today's cs went. better? it was insane. he's crazy with the awp. i top fragged like every game. 23 kills one round? yes, man. you gotta get that elo down from 8.4 though. you gotta sit in the fives with corey and i. stop eating lobster with the mobsters. start eating shrimp with the wimps like us. anyway, i'm gonna send you over to my wife's stream.
1:46:31 and i'll be back on monday. have a good weekend everybody. later!
1:47:01 i mean it writes itself. i guess that's a fucked up thing to say when i'm the motherfucker stealing your writing. but from my perspective it definitely seems like it's writing itself.
1:47:34 in the name of sub, yeah. i live in the name of sub. to be placed on my sub. one more, i live to be placed on my sub. something strange sitting in your gut. that's subway. an invisible sub going in your butt.
1:48:04 oh, who you gonna call? that's subway. i didn't order no sub. that's so true. two x at subway!
1:48:23 place to meet my customers ass and then you come in subway i'm listening by the way subway canada