Ranking all 100 movies I've seen in 2026

Name: Ranking all 100 movies I've seen in 2026
Uploaded: 2026-06-10
Channel: Northernlion
Description: Full searchable transcript of "Ranking all 100 movies I've seen in 2026" — 167 lines, each linking straight to that moment on YouTube.

Northernlion2026-06-10

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0:00 they're calling me the streamer who watches movies. i've seen 100 movies in 2026. i'm not gonna lie to you, it took a while. like it's the middle of june or i guess it's like early june. that's like what 160 days into the year roughly. we are on 100 movies in 160 days. feels pretty good and i thought you know what would be nice? let's freaking rank them all.
0:23 this is a list of every movie i've seen since, not movies that came out in 2026. okay? because how many movies have i seen that came out in 2026? none. and i can freaking prove that to you. at least i haven't logged any, because watch this. if i go here and i sort by
0:49 release date newest first. the newest movie is from 2025. i'm pretty sure this is from like november 2025. now i have seen a lot of movies from 2025, which is shocking because i don't think i've seen one from 2025 in like three months. but anyway,
1:05 the way that we're going to do this, we're going to go bottom up because it's going to be easiest, i think, to start from the very bottom and then to move to the very top. also, it's very... because i've been watching mostly stuff on criterion collection, most of these movies are actually just good to begin with. get out of here, bro. so you might be like, why the hell is my eighth favorite movie of all time in position 62? because we're ranking hall of fame movies, essentially.
1:35 we're watching from the criterion channel. now there's a lot of stuff that i watched on like an airplane or on prime video before i got freaking criterion collection but there's a lot of kino in here that's all you need man. start with your rating high to low yeah this is where we want to be but trust me that's going to change. okay and we scroll down to the bottom i think the bottom is going to be extremely easy man so without a doubt the two worst movies that i've seen in
2:07 2026 are jim jarmusch's directorial debut, permanent vacation, and kaganata's a big bold beautiful journey. i think they're both complete irredeemable garbage that are... they're bad for the exact opposite reason. i don't know if anybody here has seen permanent vacation. i guess it's a little bit niche. it's just unbelievably boring.
2:30 it has that jim jarmusch kind of ironic detachment, but with absolutely no payoff whatsoever. and a big bold beautiful journey is the exact opposite. it's overly sentimental and saccharine and the leads have no chemistry whatsoever. but i honestly think these are ranked
2:50 absolutely appropriately as of right now. i think that there's no reason, as bad as a big bold beautiful journey is, there's no reason to pull it under permanent vacation. which after i watched this, i took like two weeks off from watching any more movies because i just was like, maybe movies aren't for me. maybe i've seen enough.
3:12 and that's the only one and one and a half stars that i've seen this year. now we got a few two stars. now by the way, some of these are going to jump or fall. it's not going to be like let's sort the two stars and that's going to be like how they are forever.
3:28 some of the twos might jump up to a two and a half and some of the two and a halfs might fall. i also think some of the two and a halfs might go up to a three or even a three and a half. as the years gone on, my tastes have changed and some of these movies have completely faded in memory and some of them have, what's the opposite of risk seeded? they've succeeded in memory. but for now, we're gonna rank the two stars. and to be honest with you, i mean, there's,
3:59 none of these movies i really like. i think the best two star is probably clock watchers, man. i feel a little bit content moving clock watchers up to the 92 position. kind of boring, but great cast. parker posey, toni collette, bob balaban, lisa kudrow. not a bad movie, just a little bit dry. and because deborah jo rupp, you're so right, deborah jo rupp.
4:30 i also think because of when i was born and who i am, it will always be like a lesser office space to me, even though office space i think came out like a year later. the second best two star movie here? it's really tight because i'm realizing i don't really like any of these. i kind of think they're all pretty bad. if i may be honest, it's kind of boring, but
5:03 brooklyn is maybe the best out of the remaining ones, pretty much exclusively because like saoirse ronan is an amazing actress.
5:13 but it's classic like oscar bait. and i never felt more validated. i thought that this movie, i thought that giving this a two star was going to rankle a lot of people, but there's so many irish people in the comments for this review that were like, thank you, i was forced to read this in irish school and i hate it. but a lot of people who have lived in boston for like four generations are like, you can't say that shit about brooklyn. so i don't know, it's complicated, but i think it's not that bad. it's just also not that good.
5:42 now, we get into some like kind of six of one half a dozen of the other here because like all the rest of these movies are like pretty bad. i feel like you hurt my feelings which is this like tobias menzies, julia louis dreyfus, middle aged new york kind of like pseudo intellectual wankery like it's one of those movies that people would say online like you can this movie should have been a conversation. guy's wife is writing a book
6:13 and she overhears him talking to his friend and saying that he doesn't think the book is very good. okay, 90 minutes of like exploring that but not in a way that's particularly like very interesting. but i do think i mean, it's, it's better than john carpenter's dark star, which is just like, you know, you can see the seeds of what is going to become an interesting director, but is just kind of like,
6:41 ah, but we have dark star's not that bad. i gotta think about it. all of these movies are kind of like in the same vein of like there's something to like and then overall it just doesn't really work. maybe it is because at least with dark star you're like they were smoking a lot of pot when they made it. they were having a lot of fun.
7:01 brian and charles also like aggressively boring in my opinion. materialist is interesting because i actually thought this was going to be good for like the first third of it and then it completely dropped the ball. but otherwise i would say i'm content with the rankings here to be honest.
7:17 so i married an axe murderer just pisses me off because it's just mike myers. for me, it's like going too far backwards into the mike myers catalog and realizing that the dude has just been doing the same thing for 40 years. so i really think that this movie is kind of an abomination to me. you hurt my feelings, this low pains me. i mean, if you're like 52 and you live in tribeca or whatever, i bet this movie was like you're oppenheimer. but for me personally, i was just like, i just don't give a fuck, man.
7:47 is this like the first time your spouse has been mad at you? like this kind of shit happens now and then just like you'll work it out. it's not that interesting. it's really the first, you're like 52 is the first time some shit like this has ever happened. like be fucking for real man. yeah just talk, just talk it out. okay, now the two and a halfs you get into some interesting stuff here man. there's some serious
8:15 i think there's some sacred cows in the two and a halfs. i'm gonna tell you i'm not just doing this to be an asshole. i really think that in the running for the worst two and a half that i saw this year is f1. but i don't necessarily think it's the worst. i do bleeder the nicholas winding refn movie with mads mikkelsen. i actually think it might be worse.
8:48 and night bitch, you're not wrong. night bitch is also pretty bad. i gotta think about this for a second. they have like opposite problems. these are not movies that you can just look at and be like, okay, this one's 2% better. f1 is like, it has video game
9:05 cutscene energy. i mean that as a pejorative. i feel like it's one of those movies that people who like it say it's style over substance, but the style is just like what if it was like a video game cutscene made by codemasters? it's not like an interesting style, it's just slick.
9:23 it's like when they started editing movie trailers, so like when they shoot the gun, the bullets come out to like the same rhythm as whatever the song is in the background and people were like, whoa! well, this is crazy. now bleeder is like,
9:41 a dark gritty movie that i don't know how many people have seen it, but it has in my opinion, and i'm not trying to be reddit about it, if you've seen the movie feel free to weigh in. if you haven't, shut your mouth. it has what i would consider to be a twist in it that undermines the entire movie. like the first two thirds of the movie i was like this is pretty good,
10:06 maybe not amazing, but pretty good. isn't it funny mads mikkelsen plays a guy who has like no understanding of how to talk to women. like this is a highly fictional movie. when they do a twist that to me makes no sense whatsoever. it's 26 years old just say the twist. okay i guess that's a good point. probably if you were to see bleeder you would have seen it by now. basically
10:28 a loser gets his girlfriend pregnant and then their relationship breaks down and he physically abuses her and her brother who is like a danish gangster kidnaps him and has him like strung up in a garage and then the movie's called bleeder because they... keep in mind i didn't write this shit. take this shit up with nicholas winding refn, okay?
10:58 they find someone with hiv and give him like an hiv positive blood transfusion which when you're watching it at first you're like okay a obviously like fucked up obscene but b also you're watching you're like what if he gets back together with your sister bro what if he gets back together with your sister then you you fucked up like severely
11:25 so you're just watching it and going like, i think this is just so far beyond, like they just did the twist to be like, it got people talking was the way i felt about it. but night bitch is like,
11:44 the husband and night bitch is how like everybody on girl dinner diaries talks about their relationship. like he's such a fictional construct of someone's mind that it pissed me off to watch it. and also it does absolutely nothing with the metaphor that like
12:01 like becoming a mother gets you more in touch with the fact that human beings are just animals. it does absolutely nothing. you would think like, oh she'd be exploring her animal side, but she doesn't really explore her animal side. she just like eats roadkill and shit like that. like it's, i can't tell if it's played for laughs or if it's played for, if it's supposed to be an empowerment of motherhood or womanhood. like it just does, i feel like they just didn't go deep enough into it.
12:32 bleeder is like remarkably irritating in my opinion. i really don't like bleeder. night bitch and f1, to be honest, i mean if f1 was made into a video game, which i guess they've done 2,000 times, you would watch the cutscene and you would probably be like, that cutscene was pretty good, fair enough. now i think the roses, how i don't know, spinal...
13:06 realizing wait, wait, wait, some of the two and a halfs might even be worse than some of the twos man. i don't know clock watchers is pretty bad. i'm a millennial. i have to think about how to frame this. i'm a millennial. i'm like i might be exactly the same age as lena dunham. the tiny furniture is just like too lena dunham for me. it's just too new york, too
13:36 2010, like i get that this is what's going on. i like movies set in new york as you'll see when we get up, but it's just like when it goes wrong, it goes very wrong. and then i really, i just can't get over that she fucked the dude in the aluminum tube at the end. and then like, all i'm like, this is not one of those things where i'm like, i can't believe this character is doing something that i disagree with. but i was like, the dude is so slimy.
14:04 obviously i'm missing something. i guess he's attractive because he like reads books or something like that or he reads like one book or he's read a couple books but i was just like i can't get over this. it's just a little it's a little too much for me. we can do this in like reverse order. the best two and a half that i watched this year is the doom generation and that's because it's not even a two and a half. in my memory this movie has grown
14:31 significantly. now i don't think it's gone up to a four, but i think a two and a half was not the proper assessment of this film when i watched it, to be honest. and the second best is probably training day, which i still do not think is very good. and then of these speaking parts, i'll not spend too much time on the movies that
14:56 the fewest amount of people have seen i guess but is like more interesting at least it has something interesting going on. how to get ahead in advertising is actually oh i didn't even touch on nomad here man nomad also should be above training day and how to get ahead in advertising is the best comedy on the list i probably put it probably put it like right there.
15:24 training day two and a half. i mean there's probably as librarian made a training day video yet i really think training day is not good. and i think i think that movie critics in the year 2000 or 2001 i suppose we're just wrong i think that they were wrong and if you if you don't think that that's possible that doesn't mean that it's like that this is right, but if you don't think it's possible crash one best picture, okay, and
15:55 in 2006. now it took like two years later for them to be like, wait, we fucked that one up. but at the same time, like the critics back then were like, oh my god, this is like, we've never seen a major motion picture that tackled this, this issue before. i think so. a there's like an age poorly. b the denzel character
16:17 who i've forgotten the name of now, but you're going to tell me because it's like you've seen 3,000 like stoic omega videos of him. it's not q lazarus. alonzo, that's it. okay. i think that his performance is the best thing about the movie, but i do also think that it borders on an impression. it's like a complete one note performance that is like just exaggeration. and i still maintain that his plot
16:51 alonso's plot in the movie makes no sense whatsoever. his plan makes absolutely no sense to me. and not because you might actually see training day, the thing that ends up being the deus ex machina that saves
17:04 ethan hawke is so contrived as to boggle the mind. like it boggles... the fact that they ground the movie in like a, this is really what life is like, man, you gotta play both sides of the law if you wanna be a cop in los angeles. and then all of a sudden they're like, oh, by the way, this shit really happened. i think it's insane. he's plot brained, it's okay. i mean, this is a plot driven movie. what do you want me... if this shit was like,
17:36 speed racer and i was like there's a what they put on slick tires but then they have great traction like that would be a different story. this is a movie this is an anton fuqua best picture bait movie like it's designed to be carried by the plot and performances
17:51 this is not a style over substance. let me, your review is four and a half, wow, ethan hawke was baby girl in this and you're going to accuse me of being a plot cell? meanwhile, you don't even know the shit that i'm going to say about singing in the rain. singing in the rain is going to be up there. i'm going to go off for like 20 minutes about people who are like, yeah, the movie is pure old hollywood magic, but what's going on with the broadway melody? the broadway melody is the best part, motherfucker. gene kelly is letting his nuts hang.
18:17 accuse me of being a plot cell in a movie that exists only to sell dvds in 2001. go look at the rest of antoine fuqua's filmography and then tell me what's more logical, that he went off once with training day or they're all actually at the same level and critics got this one wrong. okay, i can live with this. now we get into the threes. there's lots of threes. no, there's not that many threes actually. the worst of the threes, i mean this is tough, man.
18:54 what's the best of the threes? i'll start you off with one thing. the doom generation is in the threes and it's not the bottom. the worst of the threes is probably golden balls, man. i literally watched this because it was a foreign film with javier bardem and i'm like, i haven't seen much spanish and mexican cinema. and what could i say about golden balls? it is a movie in spanish with javier bardem.
19:27 basically, that's all i got for you. it also has bruce willis' girlfriend from pulp fiction. so this was not the movie that i should have watched as my introduction. wait till you get to hamon hamon? yeah, but i'm not going to watch that because i watched golden balls and i was like, i don't need to see hamon hamon because benicio del toro is in it. yes, benicio del toro is in it for like, he's in it for like 11 minutes. he plays a role.
20:03 i know most of the people on letterboxd that watch this were on their phone until benicio del toro showed up and honestly i'm not even mad at them for that one, that's valid. i mean to be honest there's some of these movies i actually kind of like. urbanized which i watched last week is literally just like a youtube video essay that gives you a primer on urban planning. it's like unremarkable but not bad. it's a breezy 87 minute watch, nothing wrong with it.
20:39 metropolitan i think is appropriately, well honestly i would put late night with the devil below. i have an axe to grind with movies that basically succeed just entirely on having a gimmick. and i think the gimmick is really good. it's like half of the movie i was like, damn this is like, they're doing a good thing here. and then it just sort of, they coasted to the end in my opinion. what gimmick bro? i mean it's a gimmicky movie. the whole thing is shot as if it's like a late night tv show.
21:13 it's really fun though. i mean parts of it were really fun. it wasn't really fun trying to think of like what i would write for a review but when i realized that after watching it they use generative ai for like the interstitial screens but
21:27 that wasn't very fun but the movie itself was kind of fun, kind of not fun and my neurotypical ass was just like wait i know this guy, i know this guy and then i realized it was the guy who played bane in the second and third matrix movies you know the one who like when agent smith escapes from the matrix and ends up in zion, the guy he fucking
21:53 fleshmanced into is the skeptic from late night with the devil. go look it up, man. i swear it to you. wrong movie, bro? no, not the wrong movie. west elm caleb, you've been crashing out a couple of times. you've been wrong every time. first, you've been wrong about training day, which is not a four and a half. you can review it yourself if you want, but my review's not going to be four and a half. secondly, the dude who played bane also plays the skeptic, like the james randi type in late night with the devil.
22:22 i honestly wasn't really fucking with the ugly stepsister almost for the same reason that i wasn't really fucking with late night with the devil that much and the main reason is like it's like a gory gross reinterpretation of the myth of cinderella from the perspective of the stepsister i was like, okay again it's one of those things where it's like i almost feel like you would see a reddit post that's like why has no one made this before and then you watch it and you're like, oh because it's like oh
22:51 the gimmick is the thing that carries it like 100% of the time and the movie itself is like just okay. not bad, not bad but just okay. now we get into some interesting stuff here. i'm realizing this is going to take like 12 hours because i mean these are the easy ones to react to be honest with you. metropolitan is fine kind of like
23:16 noah bomb batch before noah bomb batch nowhere i do think even though i rated it higher than the doom generation i think the doom generation is actually better. i think i got it wrong without being too insane. i feel like the friendship kind of disappointed me man that for me this was where i hit the point where i was like both tim robinson and paul rudd need to do they need to mix it up a little bit.
23:47 they're great at the things that they're doing. they're great at playing tim robinson and paul rudd, but i've already seen so much of it. i felt like i didn't need, you know, like 98 minutes of it again. they need to break bad a little bit. don't talk about rashomon. we're slaying other sacred cows. by the way, i think this movie's good. i gave it a three. i didn't give it a one and a half, but at the same time, i was like, this is, i don't know. i wanted more. i expected more.
24:18 everything else i think is appropriate. i kind of like together, man. plugs a little tim, but they okay. also love the bit of like, tim, you're gonna lose her, tim. tim, you better step up, tim. you're gonna lose her. anyway, drop the cap for my water bottle, man.
24:47 uh, okay, now three and a halfs are where i mean, i might have like 43 and a halfs. i might have six three and a halfs. i'll tell you without a fucking doubt, the worst three and a half that i saw is peter bogdanovich's what's up doc? and this movie is like beloved by people who love screwball new hollywood comedies. i fucking could not stand barbara streisand's character.
25:11 in this movie. i could not stand her. i just don't know what was she doing, man? why was she trying to ruin this guy's life for no reason? she's just bored. she's bored and she's trying to ruin his life? she's being bugs bunny? yeah, but like... and also, why is ryan o'neill going along with it? and also,
25:37 why is everyone so al madeline wouldn't you if your wife was madeline kahn in that movie? she literally did nothing wrong. what did she do wrong in there? she was like, don't cheat on me. oh, make sure you take your briefcase to work. she's literally just like trying to help him. she just has kind of like a screechy voice or something like that. she was fine. her name is eunice, but and what? she wore a wig to bed or something like that?
26:09 it's a little strange as far as i'm concerned. i just died. i wasn't fucking with this at all. also hit like a very kind of like chinese phase of my life a couple of weeks ago when i watched eastern condors, encounters of the spooky kind, mr. vampire and a chinese ghost story. but i'll tell you, i personally, personally, i don't know how many people out there have seen the baltimoreans, but the baltimoreans was pretty good
26:44 but for me, a, probably would have carried a little bit more cache if i watched it close to christmas instead of watching it like in march for some reason because it is a christmas movie. but also feels a little bit like...
27:01 i don't know, this is not fair to a movie that's actually pretty good but at the same time i was like if only one every five or ten movies or one every five or ten years, one movie every five or ten years can make it as a christmas classic, the holdovers ruined it for everybody else. you gotta wait, if the baltimoreans comes out in like 2031 instead of 2025 it probably plays a lot better.
27:24 because i was just watching this and i was like, oh, two interesting characters weathering the holidays alone and nobody else really fucks with them? sounds a little bit like the holdovers. holdovers sucked, i'm sorry. well, lucky for you i didn't watch it this year. i think i gave it a four and a half or a five. holdovers was garbage. what'd you give, uh, what'd you give project hail mary just for curiosity? holdovers, don't, don't be talking shit about alexander payne movies in my fucking chat. five hearts and a star, classic.
28:01 i'll say it. i think old joy, a, first movie i watched in the criterion collection or the channel, i should say, b, is good but also is really kind of boring. this is not old boy. this is not my favorite spike lee movie. not as good as old boy. yeah, yeah, yeah. no josh brolin. no, i don't know anybody else who's in the american old boy remake. i can't remember because i've never seen it this year. elizabeth olsen, really?
28:37 you really are a plot cell. i gave it a three and a half. my dad would have given old joy a one and a half. he would have been like, i don't get it. the one guy is getting married to a lady, but i think he's in love with bonnie prince billy. i think that like, it's fine. and it's a really like, i don't know, it feels like a very modern movie, considering that it's literally 20 years old this year. it feels very like contemporary, but otherwise i was like,
29:11 it felt pretty long for like a 76 minute long movie let's put it that way but it is true in life you're either the motherfucker leaving the diner to take a phone call once a day and your other friends are going he has to he has to call once a day what the hell's going on with that or you're the dude that's jumping over uh like big bonfires that i forget what park will oldham was at in this but i mean it left an impression obviously because i remember it
29:45 who are you? i'm the guy stepping away to take the phone call. are you dead ass? how the hell is what's up doc under roofman? well, a, i haven't gotten the roofman yet. but also b, it's my list. you want to make your own list? then you fucking go make your own list, bro. i'll find a sacred cow to be upset with as well. i'll be like, what the fuck do you mean you've got the lay boner at a four out of five? it's literally going to be in my top four, man. it's my list.
30:16 roofman's the worst movie i watched last year. i've seen like, okay, like two years ago when i watched no movies and was never on letterboxd. i took your opinion so seriously, but now that like i look at the letterboxd profile of anybody who leaves a comment on my review, i'm not scared of you guys anymore.
30:33 because every single one of you has like a keynote, performative, curated top four of only classic cinema that is appropriately varied by decade, by genre, by country, etc. etc. but the last movies you've watched which shows your true appetite is slop, slop, slop, slop, slop.
30:55 big slop, like, you know, good slop. like hollywood slop, slop, slop, slop, slop, slop. concert documentary, concert documentary, slop, slop, slop, slop, slop. so i think that you use your top four to be, not all of you, because some of you, i click on your profiles and i'm like, damn, i haven't seen anything in the last like 50 that they've seen, but they like eat their vegetables. oh, i watched an old movie. it was kind of boring, but also i loved it. put it in the top four and then you're like, oh, now i can watch.
31:26 now i can watch k pop demon hunters again. that's why i'm not scared of you anymore. it's like the difference between don't show me your fucking food diary, okay? or your pictures on instagram of what you cooked. show me a before and after of your pantry. and that tells me what you're eating, which tells me what you fucking like and what you don't fucking like. and if the lettuce is going bad in the fridge, don't put leafy greens in your top four. it's dishonest.
32:03 that's why fucking roof man is a three and i think it's an honest three and a half. there is also something to be said for like, you know, you can't really evaluate like roof man against what's up doc? because the movies came out like 50 years apart. okay. what that's like going to gamespot and being like, well, but you gave ocarina of time a 10 in 1996. and now you're giving like this. this is a date point for like there's a
32:32 you have to look at the strata of when it came out as well. like i wasn't reviewing roof man within the context, like let me put it this way. i went into what's up doc with people saying this might be one of the best comedies ever made and then when i watched it i was like barbra streisand is so annoying in this. i watched roof man, i heard people saying hey it's pretty good and then i watched it and i was like no they were right it's pretty good. okay now can we get back to this because it's going to be a fucking minute okay? old joy
33:11 i would say of the chinese horror comedies i've been watching recently, encounters of the spooky kind is my least favorite. number six seven by the way, we made it. mistress dispeller, a very interesting documentary that makes you realize that this 58 year old chinese man must have been fucking amazing in badminton because he was like irresistible to women apparently. have to, of these,
33:52 fresh kill, which i just watched, is probably the worst, but also still interesting. roof man, yeah, i say roof man's probably worse than rashomon now that i think about it. roof man's probably a little bit worse than rashomon. but if you were to ask me which one would i rather watch again, the answer is probably neither, to be honest.
34:23 i think the answer is probably neither. rashomon's freaking boring. i don't even want to get into my rashomon take because i'm going to get accused of being that one friend who's too woke. let me just put it this way, i think that movie is anti feminist. i didn't say a kurosawa hates women. i just said, when i was watching the movie, i was like damn, whoever directed this could really be accused of misogyny.
34:48 because the only thing that all three of the stories agree on is that she was kind of... she was off the pen, let's put it that way. that's the only theme between the three of them that are exactly the same.
35:10 i would be okay rashomon is probably the best of the three and a half's. i honestly also think eastern condors is better than but i'm a cheerleader but i understand i'm not i like this movie i'm not the target demographic of but i'm a cheerleader for sure and i am the target demographic of eastern condors because at the end of the movie they have like a one on one actually it's a two on one kung fu fight in a missile silo between like
35:37 two american commandos and vietnamese wembe. has anyone seen eastern condors? they found like a seven foot tall guy with a mustache to play like a communist general.
35:53 and the whole time you're watching, he's like, this guy doesn't know kung fu. and then they try to like hit him and he parries it and hits them with like a fucking elastic roundhouse kick in the chest. and you're like, oh shit, he's the best at kung fu. holy fuck. they did not have that in but i'm a cheerleader. absolutely true. okay. of the fours, and there's gonna be, there might be 24s. of the fours,
36:33 i'm trying to think was there anything that like i wasn't really fucking with that much. damn, we have 42 four and a halfs and fives. the fives were gonna break some hearts for sure. only four stars for yoh jimbo is kind of criminal. it's kind of a four star movie, no disrespect. my favorite of the three karasanwas that i watched was uh was throne of blood. he should make more 90 minute long movies like uh like roofman so i could watch more of them. i do like at the end of yoh jimbo when he says
37:10 the mayor comes out and he's like, yo jimbo what did you do to my town? and yo jimbo goes, you should fucking end your life. it's the only honorable way for your life to end is to kill yourself right now basically is what he says. now the worst, by the way i'll tell you straight up from watching 100 movies this year i know my biases. my bias is 1980 to 2005. if a movie comes out in 1980 to 2005
37:47 it probably just gets like a very good chance at an extra half star to one star just because that's the era that i associate with like this is peak cinema. there's something i mean when i watch a movie that's really modern, i have to remind myself, oh like this is a modern movie and when i watch a movie that's really old i have to remind myself like this is an older movie like you have to meet it on its own time. because you grew up then? yeah, yeah exactly because i grew up then.
38:17 the 80s was pretty bad though. i mean not for movies man. some incredible movies came out in the 1980s. 80s are really old? okay, who cares? there's lots of decades older than that. source? 80s is when it started going downhill. guys we're talking about movies.
38:49 by the way, you will not find back to the future, back to the future 2, and back to the future 3 on here. you will find those in your top four. so before you come for me, i mean we're talking about blood simple, we're talking about john woo's the killer and shit like that. we're not talking about whatever the fuck you got a beef with. i don't know, like beverly hills cop 8 or something like that. we're talking about robocop. we're talking about an autumn's tale.
39:14 where's hard boiled? it's fucking in the five stars where it belongs. you don't even know you're so primed to get mad. you're like an exposed nerve in the mouth. you don't even know that it's your fault that your dental hygiene is so bad that you're in pain. your media diet is so bad that you're primed to be so touchy. you don't even know hard boiled is like up here, man. it's way up here. it's at number seven right now.
39:41 now can i say something while i was scrolling here? i went a little hard on splitsville. splitsville should be down here. i really like splitsville. i think splitsville is underrated. that should probably be in the fours. i mean it's not exact, it's not eden no brother where art thou is lunch. let's put it that way. okay we, i mean we need to get into this otherwise we're going to be here for hours okay. the worst of the four star movies
40:18 that are here. it's probably bloody nose empty pockets but it was still all these movies are worth watching. i also think it's good but if i had legs i'd kick you. i resonated with it but clearly not as much as a lot of other people. it was definitely like night bitch if night bitch was good. blood simple existed
40:51 i mean there's some iconic lines from this. almost every movie that like is from 58 up is something that has made an indelible impact on the stream. i will never forget m. emmett walsh saying, if i see him i'll be sure to give him the message. there's some iconic moments in this but it's a lesser coen brothers movie for sure. also really nice when you get two movies from the same directors that are in the same tier because i could be like yeah oh brother where art thou is definitely over
41:21 blood simple. now of the remainder, i promise you i'm not just trying... okay, this... dude can i be... of the 2025 movies that are like stacked together here, i'm not totally sure that i like sinners more than rental family. i think they're both pretty good.
41:47 i almost feel like the difference is the angle to which i approach them. it's impossible to remove the movie from the context in which i saw it because i didn't see them like i wasn't the first person on earth to see them, right? i went into sinners being like, damn everyone's saying this is the greatest movie of all time and
42:05 up until just after they opened the juke joint. i was like, they were right. and then when the movie would like ostensibly, when most people thought it got cooler, i was like, it got a lot worse for me. i feel like once they, at this point you probably are aware that sinners is actually a vampire movie. i thought like the first half of the movie was really, really compelling. and then when it becomes like an action horror movie, i was like,
42:34 i didn't think it was nearly as interesting. but i do think that it's obviously still a really good movie with a couple of really good performances in it for sure. michael b. jordan and is it jack o'connell or am i getting confused with the dude who was in the bear costume in midsommar? but i do think it might be, well listen,
43:03 probably liked it more than than i enjoyed picnic at hanging rock, which is not but then to be honest i mean these are all good movies. this is where it's getting tough man rental family was like the opposite i went into it thinking that this movie would suck and would just be like sentimentality slop featuring wholesome chungus and
43:30 brendan fraser in japan, but it's actually it's got a good emotional core and despite being kind of like an uncool movie i thought it did a really good job. so i mean now is it i don't think i could put it above sinners man after after all that after all that i don't think i can put it above above sinners. i think a chinese ghost story is probably also below either that picnic at hanging rock is probably better than a chinese ghost story
44:05 okay, let's do some local sorts. 28 years later is also like, okay, swiss army men, obligatory, good movie, but i honestly think it wedges itself in around 54 here. slacker i really like. slacker is gonna be going up. 28 years later would be more close to the mid. i'll say it, man. trust me, by the end of this list, you're not gonna be like, wow, this guy hates paul thomas anderson. punch drunk love might even go...
44:49 i'd even go a little bit. slc punk is probably around there as well. i think the killer is appropriately placed. i'd probably move oh brother where art thou over shaolin soccer. we're all going to the world's fair is an interesting one for me. i almost feel like i watched this before i watched
45:15 i saw the tv glow so i was fucking with it before i saw i saw the tv glow but i do think it gets like an aoe buff from its proximity to i saw the tv glow. i think that of i haven't seen all contemporary cinema obviously but i think jane schoenbrunn is like
45:36 they have their finger on the pulse of what it was like to grow up online in the early to mid 2000s. it's the only time i've seen that directorial voice authentically portrayed on film. i saw the tv glow, obviously it's a trans allegory, but even beyond that it does such a good job of capturing that
46:03 weird phase in your life as a young adult when you're like 11 years old where you'll you could see something on tv in like a young adult show and get freaked the fuck out you could be like this is the scariest thing i've ever seen in my entire life. like when you watch like like a you're staying over at your friend's house and it's a sleepover and they left the tv on and you saw like one episode of the x files
46:29 and it scared the shit out of you or something like that and then you saw it years late you probably hyped it up to your friends and you were like like that it literally like traumatized me and then you all watch it together and you're like what the fuck this is cheesy as hell like this is it's played almost as if it's a comedy
46:47 but when you are at that age where you're like, you know, slowly becoming a grown up but still have like that naivete of childhood, things can have such outside significance relative to the way that, you know, an adult would see it. and i think that they have only, like that, they're the only director that i've really seen capture that effectively. it was boring, nothing happened.
47:14 the spooky pasta guy was bald. the creepy pasta guy was bald though. i think this is really good. now, it's probably like bear for me. i really like slacker though. they're not making motherfuckers like slacker anymore. all these people would be on their phones now. they would be posting all that crazy shit in facebook comments instead of posting irl by talking to people outside. take me back, man. i like splitsville.
47:52 okay, four and a half's of which there's like 30. i mean this is this is impossible this is getting really tough and that's before we even get to the fives man i would say honestly i feel fairly confident saying the worst four and a half i watched this year is an autumn's tale and these are all heavy hitters i'm putting it i'm putting splits built top of the fours. yeah, i
48:23 i think it's an autumn's tale and i don't have to talk about this one and the reason is because it has like 80 logs on letterbox or something like that. it doesn't need to be discussed and i think the second, i mean saying worst feels bad man. the green knight has actually been elevated because now i've seen two sarita chaudhary movies
48:48 so i'm like, i'm waiting, please, oh, insiné 2 nerdle, insiné 2 nerdle, please play the green knight against me so i can take you back to fresh kill and fucking ruin your life. and don't play mississippi masala or some shit, okay? that's beneath you. he rates movies like one of the extras from adaptation. they're called background actors, they're not called extras. and typically, if they had a, as atom egoion would say, if they have a speaking part,
49:18 they're not background actors. okay? you got a lot to learn. what was i saying? if i'm speaking from the heart and not being performative, i think tom popo was the next worst. i do think tom popo is good.
49:47 it would be better if it, for me, if it had none of the yojimbo ramen restaurant stuff and was exclusively the freaky ass hedonistic vignettes where they're passing the egg back and forth in the french kiss or they're cutting up a fresh oyster or something like that and then like licking the blood off of their thumb. i think that is why this movie is actually peak.
50:17 ricky, your review was bang on for tom popo. it is a little bit too long, but i think you said you were slurping it up nonetheless, but the vignettes are so good. when they put the live shrimp and like pickle it on the girl's belly button upside down in the bowl. and i was wrong about tom popo by the way. the whole time i thought it was like a wholesome chungus movie about like
50:44 you know, hey let's like i thought it was like a fictional episode of kitchen nightmares. oh this poor woman's ramen restaurant is like in it's in a horrible state. let's fix it. no man that's not what this shit is subversive. one of the most disgusting scenes is when they're all slurping up the spaghetti man. i don't have misophonia but it made me sympathetic for those of you who freaking do man.
51:09 the poster doesn't sell it? alright buddy, tom popo's been out for 41 years so like you could probably find some more interesting stuff on there. you don't need to go buy the poster like you're buying a movie ticket at the fucking multiplex in 1985 like with no other access to information like that's crazy. i think lingua lingua franca is probably next up. lingua franca is really good as well.
51:39 but it is it's probably a cut below the rest of this stuff that's getting into like really good territory. similarly bob trevino likes it. this is if i can give it a review in a positive way, bob trevino likes it is like the worst great movie i think i've ever seen. it has such like i've just you randomly grabbed this movie from blockbuster
52:06 because your dad already picked like a violent movie and you already picked like an animated movie so your mom was like i like john leguizamo and and grabbed this one it the
52:17 it's very like mid 2000s indie cinema. a young woman, her father sucks, her dad's name is bob trevino. she goes on facebook and searches bob trevino and then just starts messaging another bob trevino. but it's actually a wholesome movie about exercising your emotional demons and found family and stuff like that. i would love to be like, i'm so cynical, it actually sucked in it. this was like a two and a half. but i was like, this worked for me, man.
52:44 i probably cried like three times during bob trevino likes it. but the concept is obviously quote unquote not cool. now we got to start making some enemies. tokyo godfather's really good. i will watch paprika, but i can't put it above anything else that's still here, man. similarly, the day trippers,
53:17 a great, i mean they want to kill me, they want to kill me whenever i give a parker posey movie a four and a half instead of a five. what can i say? if you literally, i don't know if you can even see this, i took a screenshot and put it in the peloton discord. i have, of the movies that i've seen this year, my stats for 2026,
53:45 the most common actors, it's like it shows you the actors who have been in the most movies that you've seen. there's like seven hong kong martial artists because i've seen five hong kong martial arts movies and they all have exactly the same cast. and then right in the middle, parker posey. i've seen three parker posey movies this year. i can't say her name, but i've seen three parker posey movies this year. it's true. but the day trippers is like, it's good, but it doesn't leave that much of an emotional stamp, i guess.
54:17 also, sorry baby is also really good and it's better than the day trippers but now i also think we've reached the point where throne of blood is appropriately placed as we get into the top 25 here the shit gets fucking hard man. the shit gets fucking hard. sorry baby is actually really good that's why i gave it a four and a half. i know it's the third best movie for you of 2025 because you watched a
54:48 eight movies. i've watched 100 movies so far in 2026. you gave it a four and i gave it a four and a half. no, you're mad at me because you got it at number three and i got it at number 38 or whatever. like you're not even realizing these are two different scales. you have to look at it within the context of all that came before it, bro. i'll tell you one thing for sure. f is for fake is way up there. francis ha, way up there. in the mood for love is my list. that's about where it affected me emotionally. i would say it's better than two thirds of the movies that are out there.
55:38 scanners probably deserves to be right around here. i really like scanners and again it has a lot of things that work for me that i don't think will work out of the box for everybody. like you know having grown up in ontario and visited toronto a lot you can be like yeah this is what toronto is like for sure. i also just like a i don't know i have a sci fi bias in the same way that like lots of people have sci fi biases.
56:05 you're not a yearner? is this the only yearning movie you've ever seen? it's just because the number of slings and arrows i suffer for giving good but not superlative reviews to in the mood for love and punch drunk love and people go, you're not a yearner. oh yeah, what did you feel about love in the afternoon, motherfucker?
56:22 what did you feel about past lives? what did you feel about sentimental value? what the fuck did you feel about cleo from 5 to 7? what did you feel about, well this is not really a yearning movie, but what the fuck did you feel about dead ringers bro? what did you feel about when harry met sally? let's have one of the sickest head explosions in all of movies. i have to think about this. of the remainder, i honestly feel like it's too tough. it's too tough to do. i have to cancel the whole list. it's too tough to do. the green knight is the one that hurts the least to move down.
57:15 but i do feel like it's above house and love in the afternoon. because it sucks. you guys have problems. these are all great movies. i will say something good too as we reach the borderline here. marty supreme is the worst of the five star movies that i've seen this year. marty supreme deserves to be right there. it's kind of triggering me a little bit every time i scroll up to the top of the list. we haven't done the whole list top to bottom yet. we were doing a bottom to top.
57:53 but that's the easiest thing to do as like a borderline. it would be green knight. i honestly think i do like... i think this is appropriate. i would lower sentimental value and maybe this just speaks to the kind of person that i am. as much as i like sentimental value, i definitely prefer the 1985 hong kong horror comedy mr. vampire over it. i mean my review of mr. vampire, if you haven't seen it,
58:28 this shit is like they were i was speaking from the heart they were kicking the shit out of those fucking corpses man like a lot of these hong kong action movies especially the the sammo hung ones which this is just sort of sammo hung adjacent they do the thing where they finish and police story does this too although it has a killer opening as well they finish with like an un
58:50 unbelievable set piece. so for like 70 minutes sometimes you're like, not everything, like it's not that exciting, but then at the end you're like, okay, you won me back. mr. vampire opens with them like beating the shit out of some corpses. the vampires are hopping around, they're kicking them in like the side of the chest and they're just flying in the doors and like splintering the wood and stuff like that. mr. vampire was the best of them that i've seen. now i still don't think it's as good as police story.
59:19 and i think robocop's better than police story. and ghost dog, way of the samurai spoke to me. i think francis ha is better than f for fake, even though f for fake is awesome. i think, i mean, of the two 2025s, i really think we're probably looking at like this for nirvana, the band that showed the movie. a movie that is really good, without a doubt. can i say that it's better than robocop? i don't think i could say that it's better than robocop. i think that would be crazy.
59:54 and then no other choice is also really good. maybe around there. i feel okay with that. you're not seeing the light of the rivoli? have you ever been to the rivoli? griffin dunn is not a good actor. i disagree with you. when horse says lack of discipline, and then he goes, maybe. i think he's a good actor. okay, now we're in the fives. marty supreme is at the bottom of the fives. that's for sure.
1:00:49 and it's still obviously good. the second worst of the fives i really think is dead ringers even though david had jeremy talking like joel by the end. dead ringers is awesome and everybody here that hasn't seen it should see it but i do think it's the second worst of the fives. he did have jeremy saying ellie, ellie and then the next worst for me
1:01:18 i mean these are so this is tough. i'd probably go with the celebration which is also obligatory like all of these movies are really really good. i mean the celebration i think is literally playing at park this week as part of like the finn wolfhard's favorite movies collection. i mean he's like what 15 years old so he's got to have good taste. celebration is amazing for sure.
1:01:46 by the way, i don't know if anybody here has seen the celebration. if i'm at that dude's birthday party and that's what his son says in his speech, i'm getting the fuck out of there. i don't care if i got to walk home, but like there's no shot that like after the dude sits down, i'm going to be like, let's go, let's wait for our appetizers. that's crazy.
1:02:08 i get that they like stole the keys to their cars or whatever, but we'd be walking home, okay? i'm not staying in there. this is like the kind of party that ends with everybody getting shot in the head. we're in some really, really good company here. the next worst... some of these are like rankings are gonna piss you off. the next worst is a gear of the wrath of god, which is amazing. it's an incredible film.
1:02:41 god, i need to throw that party. no, don't say you need to throw the party from festen until you've seen the movie. because after you've seen the movie, you're going to be like, why did i say that shit? do not throw that party. i think it's fair to say, i'm not going to lower it yet, but the umbrellas of sherburg, i bet for 37 year old men is the easiest movie to hate of all time. and i mean this as a
1:03:19 an insult to my own demographic. i think if you explained, if you were trying to explain that this movie is actually one of the best movies ever made and then they said, oh what is it about? and you're like, oh it's like a musical. first off they would be like okay so i'm not gonna watch it and then they would, you would be like and also there's no musical numbers. there's no musical numbers in the whole thing. it's one song.
1:03:43 the whole movie is just one 90 minute long song that carries through the whole film. they would be like, i am never gonna watch that again. i'm gonna watch taken 2 for the fifth time and then i'm gonna smoke a cigar on my porch and i'm gonna go to sleep. you just convinced me not to watch it? you honestly, you would probably hate it if you think you would hate it, but it's actually incredible. this is fucked, man. i shouldn't have done this. this is fucked.
1:04:19 i think it's cleo from five to seven next but like these are these are all incredible movies. this is honestly hard for me. we've reached the point where it actually to me feels like it's harder than the execution tier list. when we got to the execution tier list and it was like would you rather be like
1:04:42 boiled alive or like tied to a post and have birds pick at you until you die and i've started to feel bad. like this is how this is how it feels to do this. because i mean i've probably seen 3,000 movies but 40 of them from this year are among the 200 best i've ever seen because back in the day i would just
1:05:05 be in a position where i would like i would just watch whatever the fuck was on tv. i'd be watching snow day and jack frost and shit like that. so these are these are all kind of sacred cows for me. fuck man. no this is fucked. i think i can live with brief encounter at 13 even though it's also like one of the most incredible movies ever made. i think after after that
1:05:44 i can put in hard boiled at 12. it feels insane to put it at 12 because i do think that there's a chance that hard boiled is the best action movie i've ever seen in my entire life. it's unbelievably good, man. motherfucker. i think, man, i think it's blue velvet next. after everything we've been through, i think it's blue velvet next.
1:06:38 every single one of them hurt to move here. i really like blue velvet and not just because it has happy gilmore's grandma in it. blue velvet also had the benefit of retroactively making me understand deadly premonition a little bit more, which was good. she was kind of mean to kyle though. why was izzy talking like she was... so i'm trying to reconstruct the ellie ellie bit from base principles.
1:07:18 why was izzy being so pressed by kyle? she's had her cortisol spiked. what do you mean he put his poison in you? he's in love. i think that i saw the tv glow comes in after blue velvet. and then, i mean we got a few musicals up here on the list which is crazy. i think it's sherberg is not as good as singing in the rain to me. this is fucked up man. okay, i can do this. i can do this with
1:07:51 it's gotta be like first instinct. bart and fink is probably, as of right now, my second favorite coen brothers movie. it is the eighth best movie that remains on the list. we've got our top seven. there will be blood, boogie nights, 32 short films about glenn gould, which is crazy. when harry met sally, mishima, life in four chapters, les bonheurs, and singin' in the rain. it might be the best romantic comedy ever made,
1:08:30 i still think when harry met sally comes in seventh here, it's criminal to readjust the position of any of these films at this point. as insane as it seems, because i've been bumping the soundtrack in my car ever since i saw the movie, and i genuinely think it's possibly the most beautiful movie i've ever seen in my entire life. there's like 15 jaw dropping shots in mishima, life in four chapters. i still think
1:09:10 i would put it down to number six here. below singing in the rain? have you seen singing in the rain? like i feel like i have to ask, whenever someone shits on singing in the rain, have you seen it? have you sat down and you fucking watched this? have you seen the shit that they're doing with their legs in singing in the rain?
1:09:44 like it's almost like you went to see cirque du soleil and they're doing some shit that you have to train for like 50 years to do that no other human being in any other generation has ever seen. and you're looking over and going, is that it? is that all there is? they're doing, it's every single musical number in the movie is superlative. it's very good, but it's the most hypocritical piece of art ever made. okay. you want to elaborate on that or are you just going to like drop it?
1:10:38 they never credit the real singer? i don't give a fuck man. you know who you're talking to, my favorite song is gaucho, they stole that shit. chatter is insufferable, also all art is derivative. not these days, all art is generative, i think. at least the good stuff. no mandarin tag? it's nice to meet you too, chatter. i actually got a huge aura buff this weekend. my teacher was like, what have you been practicing this week? and i said,
1:11:31 wabushu meiguo ren. and she went, okay, here's like, all your tones are all fucked up. and then we worked through it and then she said, what else have you learned this week? and i said, wabu dong guang dong hua. and then she went, wow, i understood what you said. and i went, yeah! we get there, bro. she understood that i said, i do not understand cantonese.
1:12:07 you have to look like kirby when you do it? i mean the number one thing that she says, and i swear this is true, she says you have to open your mouth wider. especially, she's like put some space between your lips and your teeth when you say, it's hard man. homie you don't understand english. i'm literally with, and i'm not even trying to like put my nuts on your forehead.
1:12:37 i'm a one in 5,000 english speaker. there's better out there for sure. and because we live in a perfect meritocracy, like they get sorted at the top and they become more apparent obviously. but like we're talking one in 2,500, one in 5,000 maybe. not one in one, but if we were still living in that kind of like rural agrarian society, you would be like, that guy words good. it's the guy who words better than any guy i've ever seen before.
1:13:14 you think you're better than half of chat? well, you spelled the sentence wrong, which just puts me in a position where i look like an asshole for even replying. and you're going to say it's not the same, it's a typo. okay, so when i construct a sentence poorly, that's, oh, my spirit is flawed. there's varnish on my spirit. when you type something wrong because you're watching 17 streams and drinking a dr. coffee, a cafe yishang at the same time, that's just, oh, people make mistakes.
1:13:48 you're procrastinating? well, this is the hardest part because this is like on survivor. it's like we're picking the person who doesn't go to ponderosa. and i mean, we're talking there will be blood, boogie nights, 32 short films about glenn gould, les bonheurs, and singin' in the rain. i mean, that's tough, man. who's not making it to ponderosa? i mean, boogie nights is making it to ponderosa. there will be blood is making it to ponderosa. i think as much as it pains me to do it,
1:14:31 and the movie had a deep impact on me despite the fact that it's very breezy. i think this is how it shakes out. 32 short films about glenn gould is amazing and it has me wanting to watch a lot more canadian cinema and put in some respect on colm feore's name. i just can't put it over anything else. and then honestly, i think the rest of this is actually kind of easy. i think i would elevate singing in the rain over les bonheurs.
1:15:11 i would probably move there will be blood to four and i would look at this and i would say this looks pretty good man. i would say this looks like a pretty good top four of 2020 26 so far. i think that's this speaks to me. boogie nights is one of the best movies i've ever seen. there's nothing there's no single performance in boogie nights that's as good or even close to as good as what daniel day lewis is doing in there will be blood but the ensemble cast puts it over the top
1:15:43 les bonheurs is like the exact opposite of bleeder, which we covered 90 minutes ago. it's a movie that is entirely made by a twist that is actually good. and the twist retroactively makes the rest of the movie better because you're like, oh now i completely understand the artist's intent of the movie. instead of just like,
1:16:04 i'm trying to think of a way to explain it without absolutely ruining the movie, but the whole movie makes way more sense when recontextualized by the events that happen closer to the end of the movie. and singin' in the rain is just... it's just dangling its nuts, man. i really feel like singin' in the rain is kind of like the avengers endgame of hollywood. it's movie magic. like they were doing too much and they were... and god bless them. god bless them for doing it.
1:16:40 and i really do, i thought i was going to talk about it more frequently, but more often, longer i guess. the broadway melody section is actually awesome. it's almost inconceivable to me that at one of the most successful movies of all time at the box office that like your grandma and grandpa were watching when they were 16 years old just throws in a 16 minute
1:17:06 i don't even know what you call it, like a musical number in the middle that does absolutely nothing to advance the plot, which these days seems like anathema. and if you look at like modern letterbox reviews of singing in the rain, it's the number one thing that people complain about, that modern audiences complain about is like, well, the movie had a lot of momentum, but then they had this incredible dance sequence that's like 15 minutes long that is staged. it's like with shit that you've never seen before.
1:17:35 and the entire context of it within a production standpoint is that gene kelly was like, well, if you don't spend the budget, they're not going to give it to you next time. yeah. and then they do the whole elaborate number and then the, the studio exec goes, it sounds all right, but i just can't picture it. even though they vividly have put it on display. like it's such a, it's, it's such a 10 inch your way to like lampshade this with just a cheap gag. it's so good.
1:18:07 it's crazy the movie always gets reduced to its namesake number. that's a second in the rain is like the worst song in the fucking movie bro. i get that the dude had like influenza when he filmed the scene. i mean the scene is amazing don't get me wrong but every other musical number is is gas on gas on gas.
1:18:31 anyway, i think i would leave it right here. one thing's for certain, actually i'm not even gonna say one thing for certain, certain boogie nights is at the top, but i'll tell you like without, and i didn't do jim jarmusch dirty, okay? because you could go look at fucking ghost dog, it's way up there. but one thing's for sure, permanent vacation is the worst movie i watched this year. and a big bold beautiful journey is the second worst movie i've seen this year. this is the only thing that i stand by objectively on this? and what was the exact median?
1:19:02 there you go. john woo's the killer. subdividing the shit tier, featuring such shitty movies as sinners and yojimbo and rashomon, picnic at hanging rock, and good movies such as marie antoinette, splitsville, and bob trevino likes it. get it together kurosawa, exactly. it's all dog shit under there, man. it's all dog. anything under 50 is dog shit. that's a bottom half movie.
1:19:33 oh, you really want to see something shitty? okay, watch training day, bro. i fucking hate permanent vacation, man. now let me just make sure i got this list saved. i didn't expect it to take two hours, man. save the list. your list has been saved. and then i thought that this would be a fitting kind of segment in the letterboxed arc. first off, this is very satisfying.
1:20:07 just to scroll down here and realize that every single one of these was like a peloton ride as well except for like this which i watched on an airplane but and some of them were like a peloton ride and a half because they be making them long but then we make our top four bro but i don't know how to make your top four i guess you don't forget to select your favorite films first film boogie nights second film singing in the rain
1:20:53 third film, le bonheur. fourth film, there will be blood. fourth film, spider verse. and then save. changes you've made will not be saved? okay, save them i guess. and you know how i know it's a good fucking top four for me? yours obviously is going to be different because i don't have any animated movies in mind. it's a good top four because i feel fucking impressed that i couldn't find a way to get
1:21:40 32 short films about glenn gould in there. i really wanted to put 32 short films about glenn gould in there, but i just, i couldn't do it and maintain honesty, man. complains about generic top fours, proceeds to create a similar ranking. pretends to be into kino art, talks in fucking green text arrows like a terminally online 4chan addict. two people can be overly reductive, bro. also, i don't think i've ever complained about generic top fours. i complain about performative top fours.
1:22:17 and a lot of the performative top fours, you know, i would say that they're actually a better selection of four movies than the ones that are more honest. but at the same time, they're dishonest, which makes them way worse.