Quotes about “frank underwood”
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3318.960
our grandfathers were eating 1.02 lunches per day. the decline in meals is unacceptable. that's better than frank underwood? no, man. no shot.
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3332.780
i have a, i have like a little soda bubble in my adam's apple. i can't do the frank underwood. you got to give me like a second to get the burp out. now some of you would have loved to have seen me burp into the camera. well that's something i'm willing to do because in america we have standards but only insofar as the price is right. bob barker, drew carey and me, frank underwood. pretty bad. you haven't seen the show. you're too woke to watch house of cards. and then kamala?
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1183.860
one of your top three impressions? i mean, we know what the other two are. do i even have to say it? it's not denzel, it's... how about you shut your pie hole and give me an egg salad sandwich? it's like that one right there, you know what i'm talki or frank underwood? oscar wilde once said that everything is about sex except for sex. sex is about cumming. something like that?
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1492.560
kevin spacey not a good guy. the movie's good. dude, the voice? what's what's my oh you're do you mean the frank underwood? he does talk to the camera in that movie too. he's kind of like a soliloquy merchant. hey, enel, apparently some random plus one at my wedding spent the whole time pitching herbalife to everybody. what are your thoughts on this? bro, that's not a random plus one. that's your brother's girlfriend. that's what they do. are people going to be mad at me for being in premiere with no comms? probably, right?
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1992.060
how about you shut your pie hole and give me an egg salad sandwich? it's like that one right there, you know what i'm talking about? or frank underwood? oscar wilde once said that everything is about sex except for sex. sex is about cumming. something like that. yeah, yeah, he does this every time i feed him beans. i know this is what it's like when mom says you can get mcdonald's on the way home. that's how i feel when you
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4239.820
i didn't call you frank underwood. i said you were typing like frank underwood. let the record show, let the record show i did not call you frank underwood. i said you were writing some stuff that frank underwood would write. okay. it's been a week since i did the impression. people have been loving the impressions lately. they really love jack nicholson from as good as it gets. they really liked that jack nicholson. they really liked
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2586.640
i hope so. you guys aren't kidding, his boss is 3d. that's the play right there. excuse me while i own this guy. yeah. that's a lot of damage. that was like frank underwood from house of cards. oh no man, look at my necro binder. i'm getting impeached. i think i'll let oste take the damage for me.
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3146.100
i mean if you need to stop that's also fine. no no no i've literally done no work today because all i've done is play slay the spire. lawless, lawless. so i'm working under time bro. business is taking care of me and i'm working under time. okay the new bit you're like you're frank underwood but your name is under time and instead of frank you're shirley. shirley under time. okay go. come a little closer.
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3817.700
they are the foundation of this great nation that we call wait, you got it too! not really. you kinda got it too though. nah. so then we could have two frank underwoods. well... i need you to listen to me and to shoot the other frank underwood.
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3842.080
i'm commanding you claire, shoot the frank underwood that is not speaking right now. claire, i fell into the cloning machine that they keep in the white house basement. claire, it's me. i'm the real frank underwood. this is an imposter claire. now if i were to tell you there were two frank underwoods, many people would think that would be awesome to have two of the same spouse but you know the truth, you must shoot the other frank underwood.
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3868.200
claire, remember that time that we had sex with my bodyguard? only i, the real frank underwood, could know that. and only i, the real, really real frank underwood, would know that his name is meachum. that's right. i think i fucked you meachum was six inches in you and i was in six inches in meachum. but i, the only real frank underwood would know that meachum was a top.
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3899.120
he was a top. let me ask you something. wait, it is becoming kind of like jfk. it's kind of falling apart. i think it's pretty good. okay, wait. the chili oil as frank underwood might be sick. or the chili oil as denzel. wait a sec. mama liz's chili oil. mama liz's chili oil. i didn't know you like to get wet. that's not very, that's not a good denzel. i kind of got to hit the first line though. who's the, who's the barbecue guy?
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3941.940
freddy right? yeah, i was going to freddy's but instead he's going to mama liz's there we're still cook we're cooking on levels that have never heretofore been seen man. we're doing frank underwood impressions. yeah mama liz how do you get that chili oil? i told you to stop calling me mama liz. i'm frankie the television actor with the deepest voice in tv history can you imagine if his name was frankie?
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4190.200
i got him sorry. yeah, it didn't take much and i am not stopping him. you kind of brought me back. kind of resuscitated me. you sure about that? you hit me with the defib. what do i do? i'll take some damage. now if i could just hit the denzel, who would have been awesome as frank underwood as well? and i'm not just saying that already. what if we did this?
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4238.860
and this? okay. oh, dude, if this was like 2013, a slay the spire let's play on the machinima main channel as frank underwood would have gone. that could have been like huge, man. that could have been huge. before... frank underwood plays slay the spire 2 episode 15! he should just start doing that for his christmas videos. he'll be the move. gaming channels are, they're on the way up. have you seen this? every youtuber's like,
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4274.400
i'm gonna come watch me on ijustine gaming. nah man, they're crazy for that one. i think arby's should get frank underwood for their to be the like spokesman. just something about frank underwood eating a beef and cheddar. mm hmm. probably i think i'm gonna have to guess that the price is probably right right now too. yeah. no, i mean like the price is right should like hire hire him to be like watch the price is right.
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4429.580
i actually, i really love the idea of a frank underwood gaming channel. yeah, he keeps like, he keeps pausing the game and going to like the settings menu to do the monologue. i think it's, it's actually so funny. maybe not the right time, but like, or maybe it's like exactly the right time because like seven years ago people would have been like, what the fuck are you doing?
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4917.540
left side is more evil. i'm drunk right now? were you guys fucking with me yesterday? i was in a vulnerable state. were you fucking with me yesterday when you said that my denzel had gotten better? because i know the frank underwood impression that we did was high fidelity, top of the line, kevin spacey, original netflix programming.
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4947.720
but i'm not 100% sure about the denzel, okay? because the denzel, in my head, it sounds almost as... i'm now slipping into it. in my head, it sounds almost as good as my frank underwood. but the bones in my head could be deceiving me, claire. people said your daniel plainview is perfect. i'm changing the morphology of my mouth to be something like...
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3383.300
because i know the frank underwood impression that we did was high fidelity, top of the line, kevin spacey, original netflix programming. but i'm not 100% sure about the denzel, okay? because the denzel, in my head, it sounds almost as... i'm now slipping into it. in my head, it sounds almost as good as my frank underwood. but the bones in my head could be deceiving me, claire. people said your daniel plainview is perfect. i'm changing the
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2770.500
as an empath is when he pees on the sacred tree. that one for me, i was like, you can't be doing that. that's so like, you're a guest in their commune, bro. you can't pee on the sacred tree. but i guess like long story short, i guess they were just gonna like, you know, do that stuff to him anyway. so maybe you should just piss wherever he wants. that's a lot of damage. that was like frank underwood from house of cards. oh no, man. look at my, look at my necro binder. i'm getting impeached.
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2865.500
people are saying i'm working overtime. i have something to say when you're playing slay the spire it's not work. i mean if you need to stop that's also fine. no no no i've literally done no work today because all i've done is play slay the spire. lawless logic. so i'm working under time bro. okay the new bit you're like you're frank underwood but your name is under time and instead of frank you're shirley. shirley under time. okay go. come a little closer.
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2961.380
impressions are the they are the foundation of this great nation wait you got it too you kind of got it too though no so then we could have two frank underwoods well i need you to listen to me and to shoot the other frank underwood i'm commanding you claire shoot the frank underwood that is not speaking right now
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2992.520
claire, i fell into the cloning machine that they keep in the white house basement. claire, it's me. i'm the real frank underwood. this is an imposter, claire. now if i were to tell you there were two frank underwoods, many people would think that would be awesome to have two of the same spouse, but you know the truth, you must shoot the other frank underwood. claire, remember that time that we had sex with my bodyguard?
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3018.900
his name is only i the real frank underwood could know that and only i the real really real frank underwood would know that his name is meachum that's right i think i've fucked you meachum was six inches in you and i was in six inches in meachum but i and the only real frank underwood know would know that meachum was a top he was a top let me ask you something wait it is it's becoming kind of like jfk it's kind of falling apart
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3051.400
i think it's pretty good. okay, wait. the chili oil as frank underwood might be sick. or the chili oil as denzel. wait a sec. mama liz's chili oil. mama liz's chili oil. i didn't know you like to get wet. that's not very, that's not a good denzel. i kind of got to hit the first line though. who's the, who's the barbecue guy? um, freddy.
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3213.680
he's absolutely right. and this? okay. oh, dude, if this was like 2013, a slay the spire let's play on the machinima main channel as frank underwood would have gone. that could have been like huge, man. that could have been huge. before... frank underwood plays slay the spire 2 episode 15! he should just start doing that for his christmas videos. it'll be the move. gaming channels are, they're on the way up.
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3309.860
i actually, i really love the idea of a frank underwood gaming channel.
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3875.200
like i talked to other dads about gaming. some of them don't game, but the ones who do, it's not like they're really playing a lot of new stuff that comes out. they're basically like, i started, like they're playing the same way kevin spacey got stuck as frank underwood when house of cards, well when he got canceled, but house of cards kept running. this is like what happens to dads when their kid is born. they're just playing the last game they got into when their kid was born forever.
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